[NONCANON] My Random Shit: Virtual Booster

Elitist    R  Creature – Human Advisor Royal (Elitist is Gold, and has Indestructible and Hexproof) : Tap target creature with less than $10.00 CAD on it, Elitist deal's X damage to it's controller, then you gain X life, where X is it's converted mana cost 1/4	Pharmer    U  Creature – Human Farmer Horror : Create a 0/1 green Plant creature token with Defender, then pop a pill 2/2 Farmacist    U  Creature – Human Cleric Horror : Create a colorless Prescription artifact token, then eat a carrot 2/2	Falter of Fate    U  Sorcery Choose one: – Put target permanent on the top of it's owners library – Search target player's library for a card and put it onto the top of their library, then shuffle.	Candy Apple    U  Artifact – Delectable : Sacrifice Candy Apple, gain 3 life, untap a child you control, activate this ability only if you have eaten sugar this turn
Nemcatcher's Net    C  Artifact Nemcatcher's Net enters the battlefield tapped , , Sacrifice Nemcatcher's Net: Target Faerie you don't own or control gets +3/+3 and it's owner gains 45 life. It deals damage equal to it's power to you, twice.	Rule 63    C  Creature – Embodiement Males are females and lose male type and females are males and lose female type 6/3	Pepperoni Pizza    C  Artifact – Food : Sacrifice one eighth of Pepperoni Pizza, draw a card, then gain 2 life if the drawn card was the color of a pizza topping you have eaten in the past 24 hours	Cowward    C  Creature – Cow Coward (Cowards cannot block) Cowardice (Whenever a creature with a higher cost, power, or toughness than this creature enters the battlefield, exile Cowward thrice and lose 100 life.) 0/1
Dull Dagger    C  Artifact – Equipment Equip Equipped creature gets +2/+0 and has "Whenever this creature blocks or is blocked by a dull creature (a creature is dull if it has greater toughness than power) this creature shocks them"	Zombee    C  Creature – Zombie Insect Flying 2/1	Cheesecake    C  Artifact – Food : Sacrifice Cheesecake, gain 1 life, activate this ability only if you have spent more than $49.99 CAD in the last fifteen seconds	Sweet    C  Enchantment – Aura Enchant permanent Enchanted permanent is white, may not attack or block, is an Angel in addition to it's other types, and has ": Eat something with sugar, gain 1 life"
Red Bandana    C  Artifact – Equipment Equip Equipped creature is Red in addition to it's other colors, has Protection from red, and gets +1/+0 for each Red creature in play Red creatures have protection from the equipped creature	Eat Cat    C  Instant Destroy target Cat. You gain 3 life Eat Cat costs less to cast if you are Asian and consent to this stereotype	Bay Sick    B  Basic Instant As an additional cost to cast Bay Sick tap an untapped Island you control Destroy target tapped Food, it's controller loses 2 life	Monsterella  T  Token Artifact Creature – Food Monster , Pay 1 life: Target player loses 1 life 0/2

Elitist (rare)
Pharmer // Farmacist (uncommon)
Falter of Fate (uncommon)
Candy Apple (uncommon)
Nemcatcher's Net (common)
Rule 63 (common)
Pepperoni Pizza (common)
Cowward (common)
Dull Dagger (common)
Zombee (common)
Cheesecake (common)
Sweet (common)
Red Bandana (common)
Eat Cat (common)
Bay Sick (basic)
Monsterella (token)