[NONCANON] My Random Shit: Virtual Booster

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Mechanics | Shiftrrs | Mechanics 2.0 | Set symbol | Grey Mana | Yellow Cards in this Set | Sins & Virtues | Basic Animal Groups | junk | verbosity gone wrong | Finishing Move Series | my shitpost | high quality shitpost 2
Printable
This booster was generated with modern collation since the cardset contains mythics: 1 rare / mythic, 3 uncommons, 10 commons, 1 basic land, 1 token.
You could alternatively have 15 random cards regardless of rarity.
 R 
Enchantment
non-Child, non-Soldier creatures may not be moved around the board
 U 
Creature – Hound Wizard
Whenever Caninus Archmage attacks, you may play another target creature spell from your hand with converted mana cost 3 or less, it is tapped and attacking, it gains +3/+1 and has Haste until end of turn, exile it at the end step
3/1
 U 
Instant
Destroy up to three target teachers
I accidentally said Orgasm instead of Organism in science in front of forty 13 year olds, my life is over.
 U 
Creature – Beeble
Blabbering Beebles is Unblockable if defending player has talked this turn

Whenever Blabbering Beebles deals combat damage to a player, you may talk for 15 minutes, if you do, deal half of a damage to target player for each sentence you pronounce properly
3/2
 C 
Creature – Horse Worker
2/2
{y}{y}
 
 C 
Artifact – Food
{t}: Sacrifice Ramen, gain 2 life, then discard 2 cards, activate this ability only if you are in college
College sucks...
 C 
Creature – Imp Idiot
{t}: Add {u}
{2}{u}, {t}: Create a Book token
the imps of the yuyusian hills are known to be wimpy
0/0.999
 C 
Creature – Human Internetian
Haste
1/1
{x}{g}
 
 C 
Enchantment – Aura
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +0/+X and is a Fatso in addition to it's other types. If X is five or more, enchanted creature also gains Trample.
 C 
Instant
Exile target artifact, colorless, Robot, Internetian, Spam or Troll permanent
{g/b}
 
 C 
Creature – Human Druggy Idiot
{g}{t}: Stoner pings any target
{b}{t}: Create a PoisonVial token
1/1
 C 
Creature – Frog
Amphibious Toad cannot attack unless you control an Island
1/2
 C 
Instant
Flip a water bottle, if you succeed, draw a card
 C 
Creature – Human Donkey
You may activate Gotcha abilities on yourself, though only once per turn
2/2
 B 
Basic Land
{t}: Add {g}{g}{g} and you gain 9 life. Activate this ability only if you control six or more green creatures.
 T 
Legendary Token Creature – Bear
Trample, Indestructible
4/3

Gridlock (rare)
Caninus Archmage (uncommon)
Teacher Troubles (uncommon)
Blabbering Beebles (uncommon)
Workhorse (common)
Ramen (common)
Yuyu Imp (common)
First Guy (common)
Adipose (common)
Error 404: Magic Card not Found (common)
Stoner (common)
Amphibious Toad (common)
Water Bottle Flip (common)
Hypocrite (common)
Grainforest (basic)
Trinket (token)