[NONCANON] My Random Shit: Virtual Booster

Arachnidality    R  Enchantment All creatures are Spiders in addition to their other types All numbers on all cards are replaced by 8	Boo    U  Instant Boo target player, they lose 1 life Diss    U  Sorcery Insult target player up to three times, for each insult that makes them look unhappy, they lose 3 life	Horseplay    U  Enchantment Whenever a Horse enters the battlefield under your control, you may draw a card	Butt-Fugly Shacc    U  Artifact – Structure Habitat : Create three 1/1 black Insect creature tokens with haste. Activate this ability only if a creature is inhabiting this structure. Creatures inhabiting this structure get -1/-1. At the beginning of your end step, you lose 1 life for each creature inhabiting this structure. Then, if you have lost 6 or more life this turn, transform Butt-Fugly Shacc. Gorgeous Mansion    U  Artifact – Structure Habitat Whenever you would gain life, you gain thrice that much life instead. : Target player may give you $X.00 CAD, where X is thrice your life total. If they don't, they lose the game.
Goodies    C  Artifact – Delectable Sacrifice Goodies: gain 2 life, instead gain 3 life if you have eaten sugar this turn	Pinja    C  Creature – Starfish Ninja When Pinja enters the battlefield it deals X damage to any target where X is the amount of colors spent to cast it, X may not be more than 8. This damage cannot be countered or prevented, this loss of life cannot be countered or prevented 2/1	Flavorful A    C  Instant – Urge Gain 1 life for each word in target permanent's flavor text	Backwoodsman    C  Land Creature – Forest Human Farmer Backwoodsman gets +3/+3 as long as you control a Forest, if that Forest is your southernmost Land, Backwoodsman gets an additional +2/+2 2/2
Laughing Gas    C  Enchantment Sacrifice Laughing Gas, target creature becomes Silly until end of turn (Silly creatures cannot attack, block, have their abilities activated, be the target of spells or abilities, or be in combat), put an Infect counter on that creature's controller	Com Mon    C  Creature – Human Druggy Internetian 1/1	Shoe of Nigel    C  Artifact – Equipment Equip Equipped creature has Landwalk	Thief    C  Creature – Rogue Pay 5 life, : Steal target card from another player's hand 1/1
Ancient Vil    C  Creature – Vil Ancient Vil is Historic Ancient Vil enters the battlefield with 999999999999999 Age counters on it In the olden days (b4 big bang) there were Vils who were the first evil creatures, they became Evils when the idea for the internet became possible, right when the big bang wiped out their species 1/1	Purify Soul    C  Enchantment – Aura Enchant creature Enchanted creature has base power and toughness 1/1 and gains Shroud. When Purify Soul leaves the battlefield, create enchanted creature's Soulform (To create a creature's Soulform, create a token that is a copy of that creature except it's a white Spirit in addition to it's other colors and types.).	Draconic Dragon LIF POIN    B  Winged Beast/Synchro/Effect Cast this spell only if you could. Whenever you cast another nonland spell, choose ((((15-14)x36)/((9+9)x2)+(3-3))): – Refresh your Hero Power – Your opponent's Active Pokemon is now Confused. Pay three : Untap your library. Activate this ability only while Draconic Dragon is a token on your Bench. -1/2500	Astronaut  T  Token Creature – Human Astronaut Planeswalk 2/2

Arachnidality (rare)
Boo // Diss (uncommon)
Horseplay (uncommon)
Butt-Fugly Shacc (uncommon)
Goodies (common)
Pinja (common)
Flavorful (common)
Backwoodsman (common)
Laughing Gas (common)
Com Mon (common)
Shoe of Nigel (common)
Thief (common)
Ancient Vil (common)
Purify Soul (common)
Draconic Dragon (basic)
Astronaut (token)