SM Joke Card Dump: Virtual Booster

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Printable
This booster was generated with modern collation since the cardset contains mythics: 1 rare / mythic, 3 uncommons, 10 commons, 1 basic land.
You could alternatively have 15 random cards regardless of rarity.
Ixidor's Tattoo Parlor
{3}{u}{u}
 
 R 
Sorcery
Change the text of target nontoken creature you own by writing your choice of "flying", "shadow", "shroud", or "protection from green" in its text box. (This effect doesn't end...ever. At least not if you had the sense to write in non-erasable ink.)
Grizzled Janitor
{w}
 
 U 
Creature – Human Sponge
You may cast Grizzled Janitor during your cleanup step, but not at any other time. (You can't cast spells during the cleanup step unless a triggered ability or state-based action takes place at that time.)
"Cleanup in aisle...oh, to hell with it."
3/3
Dis-MEME-ber
{1}{pb}{pb}
 
 U 
Instant
You get an emblem with "All creatures get -5/-5" because--let's face it, they're all just going to die anyway.
"You can always use Terror, Doom Blade, Go for the Throat, Vendetta, Deathmark..."
--How to Kill a Tarmogoyf, vol. I
Foalslayer
{3}{b}
 
 U 
Creature – Demon
Delve
If a creature card with horsemanship was exiled with Foalslayer's delve ability, Foalslayer has horsemanship. The same is true for "When this creature dies, you gain 1 life" and "{1}{r}, {t}: Target Dwarf gains mountainwalk until end of turn."
3/3
Tutu Cat
{1}{g}
 
 C 
Creature – Cat
Tutu Cat is 2/2.
I CAN HAZ PLUS SEVNTEEN PLUS SEVNTEEN? BUT NOT IF I HAZ TO WEAR DIS HUMEOWIATING DRESS.
19/19
Five-Dollar Wrench
{b}
 
 C 
Sorcery
Destroy target creature that has a card encoded on it.
"We may not be able to break your secrets, but we can certainly break you."
--Teysa Karlov
Mirrodin's Coors
{6}
 
 C 
Artifact Creature – Ooze
Hexproof (This permanent is 3% alcohol by volume.)
Whenever Mirrodin's Coors deals damage to a creature, tap that creature and it doesn't untap during its controller's next untap step.
{6}: Recycle Mirrodin's Coors. (Sacrifice it. If you do, put a token onto the battlefield that's a copy of it.)
2/6
Multiverse of Bums
{r}
 
 C 
World Sparked Enchantment
(Sparked is to planeswalker as tribal is to creature.)
Multiverse of Bums is every planeswalker type (at all times).
Longing Memory
{u}{u}
 
 C 
Enchantment
{u}{u}: Counter target spell. Activate this ability only any time you could cast an interrupt. (You could cast interrupts between August 1993 and April 1999.)
Nesting Sliver
{4}{g}
 
 C 
Creature – Sliver
All Slivers have "All Slivers get +0/+1 and have this ability" and this ability.
1/1
One with Something
{w}
 
 C 
Instant
Draw your hand. (Lay it flat against a sheet of paper and run along the outline with a pen or pencil, then color it and show it to your mommy.)
Magikarp
{4}{u}
 
 C 
Creature – Fish
Evolve, evolve, evolve, evolve, evolve, evolve, evolve
"...Karp?"
Illus. Ken Sugimori
0/1
Energizer Bunny
{r}{r}
 
 C 
Ongoing Creature – Rabbit
(Energizer Bunny keeps going and going...)
Energizer Bunny enters the battlefield with 20 charge counters on it.
When Energizer Bunny has no charge counters on it, go to the store and buy a new one.
Illus. Energizer Holdings, Inc.
2/2
Pinocchioken
{g}{w}
 
 C 
Sorcery
Target token becomes a REAL CARD!
Just kidding. This card will now grow until it gets to be one of those 6x9 oversize cards.
Plains
 
 B 
Basic Land – Plains

Ixidor's Tattoo Parlor (rare)
Grizzled Janitor (uncommon)
Dis-MEME-ber (uncommon)
Foalslayer (uncommon)
Tutu Cat (common)
Five-Dollar Wrench (common)
Mirrodin's Coors (common)
Multiverse of Bums (common)
Longing Memory (common)
Nesting Sliver (common)
One with Something (common)
Magikarp (common)
Energizer Bunny (common)
Pinocchioken (common)
Plains (basic)