[NONCANON] Mechanic Sampling
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Arcbound Scrapheap
Modular 5
0/0
Crew costs you control cost 
less to activate
less to activateIt's good for the aetherconomy AND the aethervironment!
Defender
Emerge
When Earthbound Golem emerges, you may destroy target artifact or enchantment.
Emerge
When Earthbound Golem emerges, you may destroy target artifact or enchantment.
0/6
Lieutenant – As long as you control your commander, whenever a player makes a pop culture reference, you gain 1 life.
Sacrifice Admiral Akbar and a dozen other Alien and/or Human Rebels: Destroy target Trap.
Sacrifice Admiral Akbar and a dozen other Alien and/or Human Rebels: Destroy target Trap.
2/2
Creatures you control get +1/+1 and gain First Strike
Formidable – If creatures you control have total power 8 or greater, creatures you control also gain Indestructible.
Formidable – If creatures you control have total power 8 or greater, creatures you control also gain Indestructible.
, 
: Destroy all creatures
Channel –
, Discard this card: Destroy all creatures target player controls. You gain X life, where X is the number of creatures destroyed this way.1/5
Double Strike, Melee
: Arrogant Challenger gets +1/+1 for each Equipment attached to it until end of turn.
: Arrogant Challenger gets +1/+1 for each Equipment attached to it until end of turn.2/2
You gain 5 life
Fateful hour – If you have 5 or less life, you gain 7 life instead.
Fateful hour – If you have 5 or less life, you gain 7 life instead.
Camadoon Hardnose – Outlast
Empirical Ego – Whenever Desert-Dweller of Camadoon outlasts, you may pacify target creature.
Empirical Ego – Whenever Desert-Dweller of Camadoon outlasts, you may pacify target creature.
"Joke's on the rest of the world! I can live way longer on just cactus juice"
– Wapelap LeRag, Garel Palepaw's Kindred Spirit.
– Wapelap LeRag, Garel Palepaw's Kindred Spirit.
2/2
Each player votes for one, majority wins. If tied for majority, flip a coin:
– Create a 3/3 orange President with: Create a 0/4 Legendary Wall with Bane of Black
– Create a 2/2 black President with: Heal all creatures you control.
– Create a 1/1 white Silly President with: Destroy up to two target Structures. When you do, add 
– Create a 3/3 orange President with
: Create a 0/4 Legendary Wall with Bane of Black
– Create a 2/2 black President with
: Heal all creatures you control.
– Create a 1/1 white Silly President with
: Destroy up to two target Structures. When you do, add Reveal the top card of your library.
Radiance – Target creature and each creature that shares a color with it get +1/+1 until end of turn if you revealed a creature card with converted mana cost 4 or greater this way.
Radiance – Target creature and each creature that shares a color with it get +1/+1 until end of turn if you revealed a creature card with converted mana cost 4 or greater this way.
Fabricate 5
Remove any number of +1/+1 counters from He Who Demands Servitude,: Create those many 1/1 Servo creature tokens.
, Exile target Servo creature token you control: Prevent all combat damage that would be dealt to He Who Demands Servitude.
Remove any number of +1/+1 counters from He Who Demands Servitude,
: Create those many 1/1 Servo creature tokens.
, Exile target Servo creature token you control: Prevent all combat damage that would be dealt to He Who Demands Servitude.1/2
Dash
Whenever Lone Messenger attacks alone, you may reveal cards from the top of your library until you reveal a card with converted mana cost X or less, where X is the number of creatures the opponent(s) Lone Messenger attacked controls. Put that card into your hand, then put the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.
Whenever Lone Messenger attacks alone, you may reveal cards from the top of your library until you reveal a card with converted mana cost X or less, where X is the number of creatures the opponent(s) Lone Messenger attacked controls. Put that card into your hand, then put the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.
1/1
Knights you control have Flanking
"Sir! We're outnumbered!"
-Benalish General
"So, lets just build a better deck?"
-You, via self-insert fanfic
-Benalish General
"So, lets just build a better deck?"
-You, via self-insert fanfic
2/3
When Political Supporter enters the battlefield, target president gets +1/+1 until end of turn.
: Support 1
: Support 11/1
Will of the Council – Starting with you, each player votes for Unity or Peace. If Security gets more votes, players cannot cast spells on opponent's turns for the remainder of the game. If Freedom gets more votes or is the vote is tied, creatures get +1/+1 and gain Lifelink.
First Strike, Lifelink
Heroic – Whenever you cast a spell that targets this card, you may copy that spell and choose new targets
Heroic – Whenever you cast a spell that targets this card, you may copy that spell and choose new targets
2/3
Defender
Constellation – Whenever Starry-Eyed Sheep or another enchantment enters the battlefield under your control, you gain 2 life.
Constellation – Whenever Starry-Eyed Sheep or another enchantment enters the battlefield under your control, you gain 2 life.
0/2
Kinship – At the beginning of your upkeep, you may look at the top card of your library. If it shares a creature type with Tusklyon Cub, you may reveal it. If you do, put a +1/+1 counter on Tusklyon Cub.
1/1
When All-Possibilities Precogged enters the battlefield Fateseal 100
Whenever an opponent casts a spell, counter it and draw a card.
Whenever an opponent casts a spell, counter it and draw a card.
Flying
Eternalize
As long as Bolas' Pet has power 4 or greater, it has "
, : Take an extra turn after this one"
Eternalize
As long as Bolas' Pet has power 4 or greater, it has "
, : Take an extra turn after this one"1/1
Delve
Draw two cards.
If you exile a Wizard card from your graveyard while paying Dig into Tomes's Delve cost, draw three cards instead.
Draw two cards.
If you exile a Wizard card from your graveyard while paying Dig into Tomes's Delve cost, draw three cards instead.
Hexproof, Ripple 100
You can have any number of cards named Disciple of the Aether in your deck.
You can have any number of cards named Disciple of the Aether in your deck.
"You do not pose a threat to the time stream, if you did, I would have known and brought back-up"
1/1
Phasing
"Yo, [oldwalker], I think you're opponent's totally right here, so can I just go home?"
3/3
Sweep – Return any number of Islands you control to their owners hand. Draw a card for each Island returned this way
Buyback
Market Beam deals X damage to any target, X – 2 to another target, X – 3 damage to a third target, then X – 4 damage to a fourth target, where X is equal to the number of Markets you control.
Market Beam deals X damage to any target, X – 2 to another target, X – 3 damage to a third target, then X – 4 damage to a fourth target, where X is equal to the number of Markets you control.
You take an extra turn after this one
Spell mastery – If there are two or more instant and/or sorcery cards in your graveyard, during the extra turn, you may cast spells without paying their mana costs.
Spell mastery – If there are two or more instant and/or sorcery cards in your graveyard, during the extra turn, you may cast spells without paying their mana costs.
Inspired – Whenever Motivational Poster Graphic Artist becomes untapped, you may untap another creature.
1/1
Splice onto creature spell
When Persistent Omnicharm enters the battlefield, draw a card.
: You gain 3 life
: Return a creature card from your graveyard to your hand
: Persistent Omnicharm deals 2 damage to any target
: Target creature gets +3/+3 until end of turn
When Persistent Omnicharm enters the battlefield, draw a card.
: You gain 3 life
: Return a creature card from your graveyard to your hand
: Persistent Omnicharm deals 2 damage to any target
: Target creature gets +3/+3 until end of turnChroma – Draw cards equal to the number of blue mana symbols on instant and sorcery cards in your graveyard.
Whenever a creature dies, you may investigate.
Clues you control have "Tap this token and three other untapped Clues you control: Exile target creature that attacked this turn."
Clues you control have "Tap this token and three other untapped Clues you control: Exile target creature that attacked this turn."
Tempting offer – Tap target orange Cat. Each opponent may tap target orange Cat. For each opponent who does, you may tap target Orange cat.
Changeling
Whenever a creature enters the battlefield, you may have The Ooze that Lived For Millennia lose that card's creature type. When you do, draw a card. It cannot gain that type for the remainder of the game.
Whenever a creature enters the battlefield, you may have The Ooze that Lived For Millennia lose that card's creature type. When you do, draw a card. It cannot gain that type for the remainder of the game.
0/2
Devour 1
, Exile a creature card in your graveyard that was devoured by Consumer of the Meek: Flying until end of turn.
, Exile a creature card in your graveyard that was devoured by Consumer of the Meek: Flying until end of turn.1/1
Target player discards a card
Grandeur – Discard another card named Dark Insight, that player discards three cards instead.
Grandeur – Discard another card named Dark Insight, that player discards three cards instead.
Graft 3
Whenever a +1/+1 counters is moved from Epidermopede onto another creature, that creatures gains Deathtouch until end of turn.
Whenever a +1/+1 counters is moved from Epidermopede onto another creature, that creatures gains Deathtouch until end of turn.
0/1
First Strike
Unearth
, : Forgotten Pharaoh deals 2 damage to any number of targets. Those targets cannot block until the end of your next turn. Activate this ability only if Forgotten Pharaoh was Unearthed this turn.
Unearth
, : Forgotten Pharaoh deals 2 damage to any number of targets. Those targets cannot block until the end of your next turn. Activate this ability only if Forgotten Pharaoh was Unearthed this turn.4/3
Join forces – Starting with you, each player may pay any amount of mana. Each player loses twice 
life where X is the largest amount of mana paid this way.
life where X is the largest amount of mana paid this way.Shadow
"It looks like a puppy and acts like one too, why is it scary?"
-Impish Riddle
"The scary part is the parasitism of the mechanic"
-Impish Solution
-Impish Riddle
"The scary part is the parasitism of the mechanic"
-Impish Solution
13/13
You may cast creature spells from your graveyard
Gravestone Elemental's power and toughness are equal to the number of creature cards in your graveyard.
Zombies you control get +1/+1
When Gravestone Elemental enters the battlefield create an X/X Demon creature token where X is the number of creature cards in your graveyard
Threshold – As long as there are seven or more cards in your graveyard, at the beginning of the end step, you may create a 4/3 black Horror creature token. When you do, you draw a card and lose 1 life.
Gravestone Elemental's power and toughness are equal to the number of creature cards in your graveyard.
Zombies you control get +1/+1
When Gravestone Elemental enters the battlefield create an X/X Demon creature token where X is the number of creature cards in your graveyard
Threshold – As long as there are seven or more cards in your graveyard, at the beginning of the end step, you may create a 4/3 black Horror creature token. When you do, you draw a card and lose 1 life.
*/*
Suspend 10 –
Flying, Trample.
When He Who Has Been Watching Since Forever enters the battlefield, if it's suspend cost was paid, you get an emblem with "Whenever a creature dies, their controller loses the game"
, Exile He Who Has Been Watching Since Forever: Exile all creatures you control
Flying, Trample.
When He Who Has Been Watching Since Forever enters the battlefield, if it's suspend cost was paid, you get an emblem with "Whenever a creature dies, their controller loses the game"
, Exile He Who Has Been Watching Since Forever: Exile all creatures you control6/6
Deathtouch
Cohort –, Tap an untapped Ally you control: Destroy target creature with converted mana cost 4 or greater
Cohort –
, Tap an untapped Ally you control: Destroy target creature with converted mana cost 4 or greater1/2
Defender, Deathtouch
Transfigure
Creatures transfigured by Hoardbait Thrull get +1/+1 and gain Deathtouch.
: Return Hoardbait Thrull from your graveyard to the battlefield. It cannot have it's abilities activated until end of turn
Transfigure
Creatures transfigured by Hoardbait Thrull get +1/+1 and gain Deathtouch.
: Return Hoardbait Thrull from your graveyard to the battlefield. It cannot have it's abilities activated until end of turn0/4
Amplify 1
"Yeah, so uh, listen 'ere m8. We um, we're just gonna you know SQUAT up in your attic, eh? Don't open the hatch though, yea? we're gonna be putting our babies up in there, so thanks"
2/1
Intimidate
"Why are you all scared of a tiny thin like that?"
-(((Gigagolem)))
-(((Gigagolem)))
1/1
Haste
Raid – When Legobreaker enters the battlefield, if you attacked with a creature this turn, it gets +3/+3 and gains Trample until end of turn. There is an additional combat step where only Legobreaker may attack
Raid – When Legobreaker enters the battlefield, if you attacked with a creature this turn, it gets +3/+3 and gains Trample until end of turn. There is an additional combat step where only Legobreaker may attack
2/1
Black cards in your hand have Madness . Where X is that spells converted mana cost minus two. (X cannot be less than 1)
. Where X is that spells converted mana cost minus two. (X cannot be less than 1)"Seriously, what sane person spells their name like that?"
-MarC's spiteful Coworker
-MarC's spiteful Coworker
3/1
Evoke
When Murderous Fiend enters the battlefield, destroy target creature with converted mana cost 2 or less
When Murderous Fiend enters the battlefield, destroy target creature with converted mana cost 2 or less
2/1
: -0/-7 until end of turn
Soulshift 7
When Necrotic Soulweb soulshifts, you may have multiple targets, as long as their total CMCs add up to 7.
0/7
Deathtouch
Metalcraft – As long as you control three or more artifacts, Scraphoarders gets +2/+2 and gains Trample.
Metalcraft – As long as you control three or more artifacts, Scraphoarders gets +2/+2 and gains Trample.
4/4
Exploit
Whenever Talent Agent exploits a creature, it deals 1 damage to you and you draw a card.
Whenever Talent Agent exploits a creature, it deals 1 damage to you and you draw a card.
1/2
Destroy target creature
Gravestorm
You may have any number of cards named The Joy of Death in your deck.
Gravestorm
You may have any number of cards named The Joy of Death in your deck.
Deathtouch, Persist
It lost respect for itself long ago, it will surely disrespect it's physical form to hunt you, that's just it fulfilling contempt for two.
5/5
Flying, Trample, Annihilator 6
, Exile target creature card that entered a graveyard this turn: You draw a card and lose 1 life.
, Exile target creature card that entered a graveyard this turn: You draw a card and lose 1 life.7/6
Backwards Logic deals 2 damage to each player
Undaunted
Undaunted
"So what if nobody agrees with me? I feel like I am right!"
-Red
-Red
Boulder Launch deals 4 damage to target creature or Planeswalker that had an ability activated this turn.
Conspire
Conspire
Menace, Haste
Whenever Dennis the Menace attacks and isn't blocked, untap all creatures you control, they get +2/+0 and gain Haste and Indestructible. There is an additional combat step immediately after this one.
Whenever Dennis the Menace attacks and isn't blocked, untap all creatures you control, they get +2/+0 and gain Haste and Indestructible. There is an additional combat step immediately after this one.
4/3
When Dora the Explorer enters the battlefield create a 1/1 pink Ape Idiot Child creature token named Boots and attach an Equipment to it named Boots' Boots with "Equipped creature gets +0/+1 and gains Landwalk"
, , Tap an untapped Child you control: Explore. Activate this ability only once per turn. When it has been activated thrice, sacrifice Dora the Explorer and any creatures you own named Boots.
, , Tap an untapped Child you control: Explore. Activate this ability only once per turn. When it has been activated thrice, sacrifice Dora the Explorer and any creatures you own named Boots.2/3
Two target creatures get +2/+0 until end of turn. They fight. The winner gets $200.00CAD.
Soulbond
As long as Flameseeker is paired with a creature, both have ": Flameseeker deals 1 damage to any target. Exile the top card of the target's controller's library. You may cast that card without paying it's mana cost until end of turn."
As long as Flameseeker is paired with a creature, both have "
: Flameseeker deals 1 damage to any target. Exile the top card of the target's controller's library. You may cast that card without paying it's mana cost until end of turn."It seeks both the flame of heat and love.
2/1
Parley – Each player reveals the top card of his or her library. For each nonland card revealed this way, target Female Clown you control gets +2/+0 and gains Haste until end of turn. Then each player draws a card.
Riot
, , remove a +1/+1 counter from Liberal Protester, sacrifice then exile Liberal Protester: You may put up to three target Evil cards from your hand onto the battlefield tapped.
, : Remove a Victim counter from target permanent. Impulse draw 1
, , remove a +1/+1 counter from Liberal Protester, sacrifice then exile Liberal Protester: You may put up to three target Evil cards from your hand onto the battlefield tapped.
, : Remove a Victim counter from target permanent. Impulse draw 13/1
Creatures you control have Haste.
Whenever a creature that entered the battlefield under your control this turn becomes tapped, you may exile the top card of your library. When you do, you may cast that card without paying it's mana cost until end of turn.
Whenever a creature that entered the battlefield under your control this turn becomes tapped, you may exile the top card of your library. When you do, you may cast that card without paying it's mana cost until end of turn.
Sacrificing everything and anything for speed, since that hastily-made decision was shouted.
Haste
Bloodrush –, Discard this card: Target attacking creature gets +2/+1 until end of turn.
Bloodrush –
, Discard this card: Target attacking creature gets +2/+1 until end of turn.2/1
Escalate
– Rebellious Breach bolts any target
– Attacking creatures you control get +1/+0 until end of turn
– Impulse draw 3
– Rebellious Breach bolts any target
– Attacking creatures you control get +1/+0 until end of turn
– Impulse draw 3
Battle cry
: Target Goblin gets +2/+0 until end of turn. Activate this ability only once per turn for any given target.
: Target Goblin gets +2/+0 until end of turn. Activate this ability only once per turn for any given target.3/1
Stormstorm deals infinite damage to target creature.
Storm
Storm
Basically we turn a bunch of big lightnings into one gobsmackingly vast lightning.
Unblockable Punch deals 3 damage to any target. If a creature would die this way, exile it instead.
Split Second
Split Second
Vietnam War deals 1 damage to every target
Flashback
Flashback
Ok this is an unepic gamerless moment
Reach
The secret glade of Pew-Pew train their eyes and minds to be as sharp as an arrow's tip.
1/1
Meld a Donkey you control and another target creature. They become a 4/4 Donkey Horror Ooze creature token with Trample and Infect.
Enchanted creature gets +1/+2 and has a keyword found primarily in the color of any Aura enchanting it.
Aura swap
Aura swap
Convoke, Trample
When Endless Godwurm enters the battlefield untap each creature that convoked Endless Godwurm, draw those many cards.
When Endless Godwurm enters the battlefield untap each creature that convoked Endless Godwurm, draw those many cards.
20/20
You may play an additional two lands each turn.
Landfall Elemental's power and toughness are equal to the number of lands you control.
Elves you control get +1/+1
When Landfall Elemental enters the battlefield create an X/X Hydra creature token where X is the number of lands you control.
Landfall – Whenever a land enters the battlefield under your control, create a 3/3 green Treefolk creature token. You may draw a card.
Landfall Elemental's power and toughness are equal to the number of lands you control.
Elves you control get +1/+1
When Landfall Elemental enters the battlefield create an X/X Hydra creature token where X is the number of lands you control.
Landfall – Whenever a land enters the battlefield under your control, create a 3/3 green Treefolk creature token. You may draw a card.
*/*
Target creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn
Ferocious – If you control a creature with power 4 or greater, target creature gets +4/+4 instead.
Ferocious – If you control a creature with power 4 or greater, target creature gets +4/+4 instead.
Search your library for a Land card and put it onto the battlefield tapped
Retrace
Retrace
"I visited this world once before, and now I must find that which I left behind"
-Areo Vicca on Zendikar
-Areo Vicca on Zendikar
Choose one:
-Prevent all combat damage that would be dealt this turn. Create an 0/X Plant creature token with defender, where X is the amount of damage prevented this way.
-Reveal the top five cards of your library and put all land cards revealed this way onto the battlefield tapped, put the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.
Entwine – Tap three untapped lands you control.
-Prevent all combat damage that would be dealt this turn. Create an 0/X Plant creature token with defender, where X is the amount of damage prevented this way.
-Reveal the top five cards of your library and put all land cards revealed this way onto the battlefield tapped, put the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.
Entwine – Tap three untapped lands you control.
Level up
Level 1-3: [2/4], : You may put a land card from your hand onto the battlefield tapped
Level 4: [3/6], : Untap all lands you control.
Level 1-3: [2/4]
, : You may put a land card from your hand onto the battlefield tapped
Level 4: [3/6]
, : Untap all lands you control.1/3
Trample, THICCOSAURUS is Female
Enrage – Whenever THICCOSAURUS is dealt damage, you may gain control of a number of creatures less than or equal to the amount of damage dealt to THICCOSAURUS
Enrage – Whenever THICCOSAURUS is dealt damage, you may gain control of a number of creatures less than or equal to the amount of damage dealt to THICCOSAURUS
15/30
Cards you control with Miracle can be cast for their Miracle cost if they were the first or second card you drew this turn.
Cumulative Upkeep 
Creatures you don't control become tapped, cannot be untapped, are pacified and cannot be unpacified.
Surge
Creatures you don't control become tapped, cannot be untapped, are pacified and cannot be unpacified.
Surge
Opponents cannot cast spells until end of turn.
Addendum – If you cast this spell during your main phase, opponents cannot cast spells until the end of your next turn.
Addendum – If you cast this spell during your main phase, opponents cannot cast spells until the end of your next turn.
Choose one:
– Tap target creature. It does not untap during it's controller untap step as long Black Hat's Code is in your graveyard. Put a hack counter on it
– Target creature cannot block as long as Black Hat's Code is in your graveyard. Put a hack counter on it.
Cipher
, decode Black Hat's Code: Target player skips their next turn. You gain control of all creatures with Hack counters on them. Activate this ability only if Black Hat's Code has been ciphered this game.
– Tap target creature. It does not untap during it's controller untap step as long Black Hat's Code is in your graveyard. Put a hack counter on it
– Target creature cannot block as long as Black Hat's Code is in your graveyard. Put a hack counter on it.
Cipher
, decode Black Hat's Code: Target player skips their next turn. You gain control of all creatures with Hack counters on them. Activate this ability only if Black Hat's Code has been ciphered this game.Ninjitsu
Return a Rebel you control to it's owners hand: Prevent all combat damage that would be dealt to Level 100 Mafia Boss this turn.
Return a Rebel you control to it's owners hand: Prevent all combat damage that would be dealt to Level 100 Mafia Boss this turn.
nah man i was just hittin that level 1 crook! i didnt agree to fight THIS guy!
2/4
Kicker
Let's Kick It! – Dogfound deals 2 damage to target Hound creature.
Oops Johnny peer pressured me into killing it, cmon lets go desecrate it's remains in a last ditch attempt to not lose our XBox for a week! – If Dogfound's kicker cost was paid, destroy that creature instead. When it would die this turn, exile it instead.
Let's Kick It! – Dogfound deals 2 damage to target Hound creature.
Oops Johnny peer pressured me into killing it, cmon lets go desecrate it's remains in a last ditch attempt to not lose our XBox for a week! – If Dogfound's kicker cost was paid, destroy that creature instead. When it would die this turn, exile it instead.
Dethrone
Whenever Itzy, King-Killer deals combat damage to the player with or tied for the most life, he deals X damage to them, where X is twice Itzy's power.
Whenever Itzy, King-Killer deals combat damage to the player with or tied for the most life, he deals X damage to them, where X is twice Itzy's power.
2/2
: Satirical Jester deals 1 damage to you
: Satirical Jester cannot be blocked this turn
Renown X, where X is the amount of damage you've been dealt this turn
"Any king who can take a joke is a king for me"
-Humoro the Cooky
-Humoro the Cooky
3/1
Trample
Domain – When Territory Hoarder enters the battlefield or attacks, search your library for a land card and put it onto the battlefield tapped for each basic land type among lands you control
Domain – When Territory Hoarder enters the battlefield or attacks, search your library for a land card and put it onto the battlefield tapped for each basic land type among lands you control
5/5
Fortify – Tap two untapped creatures you control
Fortified land has ", : Add . Activate this ability only once per turn"
Fortified land has "
, : Add . Activate this ability only once per turn"Elven Grace – Bestow
Whenever Graceful Elf or enchanted creature deals combat damage to a creature, you may draw a card and gain 2 life.
Whenever Graceful Elf or enchanted creature deals combat damage to a creature, you may draw a card and gain 2 life.
2/2
Partner
, Tap another creature you control: You gain 6 life. If that creature was partnered with Inni Mason, Agreeable Agriculturalist, you gain 12 life instead.
, Tap another creature you control: You gain 6 life. If that creature was partnered with Inni Mason, Agreeable Agriculturalist, you gain 12 life instead.2/3
Mahatma Gandhi can be your commander
Defender, Mahatma Gandhi gets +0/+2 for each creature you control.
Eminence – As long as Mahatma Gandhi is in the command zone, you and creatures you control gain Hexproof
Defender, Mahatma Gandhi gets +0/+2 for each creature you control.
Eminence – As long as Mahatma Gandhi is in the command zone, you and creatures you control gain Hexproof
0/2
Vigilance
When Neighbourhood Watch enters the battlefield create a 1/1 white and green Human with Vigilance and a 1/1 white and green Dryad with Vigilance
, , Tap two untapped creatures you control: Put target creature on the bottom of it's owners library, do the same for each permanent that shares a creature type with that card.
When Neighbourhood Watch enters the battlefield create a 1/1 white and green Human with Vigilance and a 1/1 white and green Dryad with Vigilance
, , Tap two untapped creatures you control: Put target creature on the bottom of it's owners library, do the same for each permanent that shares a creature type with that card.1/1
Defender
Whenever Wall of Critics blocks a creature, you may pay. When you do, tutor Daphendor the Defensive and put him onto the battlefield, then shuffle.
Whenever a Planeswalker you control named Daphendor the Defensive would leave the battlefield, shuffle it into it's owners library instead.
Whenever Wall of Critics blocks a creature, you may pay
. When you do, tutor Daphendor the Defensive and put him onto the battlefield, then shuffle.
Whenever a Planeswalker you control named Daphendor the Defensive would leave the battlefield, shuffle it into it's owners library instead.
A mangled wall of human flesh, bones, and keyboard buttons; Made as a video essay to Yelp with comments disabled.
0/3
I hate my life, but if i die they own me further – When Enslaver Slave enters the battlefield or dies, you gain 2 life.
They make me do this and I'm sorry – Extort
They make me do this and I'm sorry – Extort
1/2
Flying, Haunt
When Old-Fashioned Homeghost enters the battlefield or the creature it haunts dies, you may destroy target creature. When you do, you gain 4 life.
When Old-Fashioned Homeghost enters the battlefield or the creature it haunts dies, you may destroy target creature. When you do, you gain 4 life.
1/3
Tribute 2
When Shrine Broker enters the battlefield, if tribute wasn't paid, it deals 2 damage to target player and you gain 2 life.
When Shrine Broker enters the battlefield, if tribute wasn't paid, it deals 2 damage to target player and you gain 2 life.
3/2
Maggotback Loafroach gets +0/+1 for each Insect you control. If that number is four or more, Maggotback Loafroach has Double Strike
Forecast –, Reveal Maggotback Loafroach from your hand: Create two 0/1 black and green Insect creature tokens.
Forecast –
, Reveal Maggotback Loafroach from your hand: Create two 0/1 black and green Insect creature tokens.2/4
Destroy target artifact or creature with converted mana cost 2 or less.
Revolt – If a permanent left the battlefield under your control this turn. destroy target creature or artifact with converted mana cost X or less instead, where X is the creature that left's converted mana cost plus two.
Revolt – If a permanent left the battlefield under your control this turn. destroy target creature or artifact with converted mana cost X or less instead, where X is the creature that left's converted mana cost plus two.
Wither
Withering Twighand cannot be blocked by creatures with -1/-1 counters on them.
Withering Twighand cannot be blocked by creatures with -1/-1 counters on them.
2/3
Put four +1/+1 counters divided as you choose among up to two target creatures.
Transmute
Transmute
Pulsating Shock deals 4 damage divided as you choose among up to three target creatures. Creatures that would die this way are returned to their owner's hands
Rebound
Rebound
Jump Boost 4, Jump-Start
, : Switch target creature's power and toughness
, : Exchange control of target creature you control with another target creature you don't control.
, : Switch target creature's power and toughness
, : Exchange control of target creature you control with another target creature you don't control.2/2
Super Haste, Trample
: Exert Usain Bolt
Whenever Usain Bolt deals combat damage to a player, add $10000CAD
: Exert Usain Bolt
Whenever Usain Bolt deals combat damage to a player, add $10000CAD
3/2
Mentor
Whenever Mirthful Mentor mentors a creature, pair them.
As long as Mirthful Mentor is paired with a creature, you may tap them both. When you do, they deal X damage to any target and you gain X life, where X is the number of turns they've been paired plus two.
Whenever Mirthful Mentor mentors a creature, pair them.
As long as Mirthful Mentor is paired with a creature, you may tap them both. When you do, they deal X damage to any target and you gain X life, where X is the number of turns they've been paired plus two.
6/2
Vanishing 2
The Sun is High in the Sky – When Solar Aetherborn enters the battlefield, you gain 1 life for each creature you control
Please, I just want to see a sunset once... – When Solar Aetherborn leaves the battlefield, it deals 1 damage to target player for each creature you control.
The Sun is High in the Sky – When Solar Aetherborn enters the battlefield, you gain 1 life for each creature you control
Please, I just want to see a sunset once... – When Solar Aetherborn leaves the battlefield, it deals 1 damage to target player for each creature you control.
3/3
Flying
Whenever Byrdraco deals combat damage to a player, untap each other creature with Flying you control.
Whenever Byrdraco deals combat damage to a player, untap each other creature with Flying you control.
It's song sparks excitement, it's cry sparks aerial assault.
2/4
Strive – This spell costs more to cast for each target beyond the first
Target creature gains any legal ability printed on a card owned by a player in this game, that is present in this game.
more to cast for each target beyond the first
Target creature gains any legal ability printed on a card owned by a player in this game, that is present in this game.
Morbid – When Serial-Killer-In-The-Making enters the battlefield, if a creature died this turn, transform it.
2/1
: Destroy target creature, any player may sacrifice three creatures to counter this ability.6/4
Trample
Whenever Agbombaloth of the Rotting Heart deals damage, target player sacrifices those many permanents.
Whenever Agbombaloth of the Rotting Heart deals damage, target player sacrifices those many permanents.
8/8
Goblin, Elf or Imp offering
Trample, Haste, Deathtouch
Whenever Ancient Volcanic God attacks, other attacking creatures you control get +2/+0
Trample, Haste, Deathtouch
Whenever Ancient Volcanic God attacks, other attacking creatures you control get +2/+0
11/7
Untap all Plant and/or Rebel creatures you control, they gain Haste and make attacks. When they do, destroy up to one target red Legendary Crab creatures with converted mana cost 4 or greater X times, where X is the number of creatures attacking this way.
Until end of turn, permanents you control have "Rally – Whenever this creature or another Ally enters the battlefield under your control, you may gain 100 life"
Until end of turn, permanents you control have "Rally – Whenever this creature or another Ally enters the battlefield under your control, you may gain 100 life"
Flying, Haste
When Warbat Legion enters the battlefield create two copies of it.
Battalion – Whenever Warbat Legion and at least two other creatures attack, Warbat Legion gets +2/+0 until end of turn.
When Warbat Legion enters the battlefield create two copies of it.
Battalion – Whenever Warbat Legion and at least two other creatures attack, Warbat Legion gets +2/+0 until end of turn.
1/1
, , Sacrifice Double Double, double two target creatures power and toughness until end of turn: You gain X life where X is the sum of those two creatures powers and toughnesses.Delirium – When Marsh Hobo enters the battlefield, if there are four or more card types among cards in your graveyard, you may exile a Structure card from a graveyard.
2/2
Dredge, unblockable, hexproof
Whenever Undying Murderous Leech deals combat damage to a player, they discard their hand. You may return creature card(s) from any graveyard to the battlefield under your control, as long as the converted mana cost is less than or equal to the number of cards discarded this way.
Whenever Undying Murderous Leech deals combat damage to a player, they discard their hand. You may return creature card(s) from any graveyard to the battlefield under your control, as long as the converted mana cost is less than or equal to the number of cards discarded this way.
"It's real crime was murdering variety in this game"
-El Honourable Justice Designé
-El Honourable Justice Designé
1/3
Council's dilemma – Starting with you, each player votes for life or choice. Search each opponents library for X Baby cards and put them into their graveyard, then shuffle the searched libraries for each time choice was chosen. If life was chosen, tap all Female creatures, their controllers lose 2 life.
Epic
At the beginning of your upkeep, search your library for a permanent card and put it onto the battlefield. Victory of Magic deals X damage to number of players and they exile the top X cards of their library, where X is that card's converted mana cost. Create those many 1/1 gold Human creature tokens.
At the beginning of your upkeep, search your library for a permanent card and put it onto the battlefield. Victory of Magic deals X damage to number of players and they exile the top X cards of their library, where X is that card's converted mana cost. Create those many 1/1 gold Human creature tokens.
Prowl
Flying
When Prowling Specter enters the battlefield, if it's Prowl cost was paid, target player discards a card from their hand.
Flying
When Prowling Specter enters the battlefield, if it's Prowl cost was paid, target player discards a card from their hand.
1/3
Haste, Flying
Hellbent – If you have no cards in hand when Vengeful Imp enters the battlefield, each player loses 1 life.
Hellbent – If you have no cards in hand when Vengeful Imp enters the battlefield, each player loses 1 life.
2/1
Ascend
: Flash until end of turn, you may activate this from your hand.
, : Create a 0/2 green plant creature token with Defender. If you have the city's blessing, put two +1/+1 counters on that creature.
: Flash until end of turn, you may activate this from your hand.
, : Create a 0/2 green plant creature token with Defender. If you have the city's blessing, put two +1/+1 counters on that creature.2/3
Assist
, : Create a Helpful Hamburger artifact Food token with ", Sacrifice Hamburger Helper: You gain 3 life then you gain 3 life"
, : Create a Helpful Hamburger artifact Food token with ", Sacrifice Hamburger Helper: You gain 3 life then you gain 3 life"0/4
Clash
Destroy target creature with converted mana cost 4 or greater. If you won the clash, when it dies, exile it instead and you gain 4 life.
Destroy target creature with converted mana cost 4 or greater. If you won the clash, when it dies, exile it instead and you gain 4 life.
Hexproof
"GAHHH! Just let me kill it!"
-Annoyed wizard
-Annoyed wizard
0/1
Hot
Fuse
Hot deals 3 damage to target creature
Hot deals 3 damage to target creature
Durable Armor
Creatures you control have Absorb 2
Create a new player called Virus with base stats.
Destroy all animal creatures. Return them to the battlefield under Virus's control.
Destroy all animal creatures. Return them to the battlefield under Virus's control.
Post-Apocalypse
Aftermath
Spells cost more to cast.
Humans have Banding, Outlast and ", : You gain 2 life". They are Farmers and Soldiers in addition to their other types
Spells cost
more to cast.
Humans have Banding, Outlast
and ", : You gain 2 life". They are Farmers and Soldiers in addition to their other typesSunburst
, Remove five charge counters from Archmage's Trinket, sacrifice it, : You may cast multicolored spells from your hand without paying their mana costs until end of turn
: Put five charge counters on Archmage's Trinket
, Remove five charge counters from Archmage's Trinket, sacrifice it, : You may cast multicolored spells from your hand without paying their mana costs until end of turn
: Put five charge counters on Archmage's TrinketFading 3
Equip
Equipped creature is Unblockable and has ", Remove CAD $499.99: Gain 7 life"
, 
: Put a Fade counter on Designer Dress
Equip
Equipped creature is Unblockable and has "
, Remove CAD $499.99: Gain 7 life"
, : Put a Fade counter on Designer Dress"NO! NO! NOT THE BLEAAAACH!"
-Nick Cage
-Nick Cage
Converge – When Mana Crate enters the battlefield, choose one for each color of mana spent to cast it:
– You gain 7 life
– You draw two cards
– Each opponent discards a card
– Mana Crate deals 1 damage to any number of creatures
– Untap up to three target lands.
– You gain 7 life
– You draw two cards
– Each opponent discards a card
– Mana Crate deals 1 damage to any number of creatures
– Untap up to three target lands.
, : Imprint – Exile target Child creature permanent. Spells with the same name as Children imprinted on Naughty List this way cannot be cast
, : Imprint – Exile target Child permanent. Creatures with the same name as Children imprinted on Naughty List this way get +1/+1Cumulative Upkeep
At the beginning of your upkeep draw X cards, where X is one plus the number of age counters on this permanent.
At the beginning of your upkeep draw X cards, where X is one plus the number of age counters on this permanent.
Equip
Living Weapon
Tap equipped creature: It deals X damage to each creature, where X is it's base power plus one.
Living Weapon
Tap equipped creature: It deals X damage to each creature, where X is it's base power plus one.
It's not fair to use more than one square – : Remove up to three -0/-1 counters from target creature, activate this ability only once per turn.
Cycling
: Remove up to three -0/-1 counters from target creature, activate this ability only once per turn.
Cycling
Hideaway
: Add one mana of any color, activate this ability only if you control two or more Wizards
, : You may play the exiled card without paying its mana cost if all creatures you control are Wizards.
: Add one mana of any color, activate this ability only if you control two or more Wizards
, : You may play the exiled card without paying its mana cost if all creatures you control are Wizards.Show frames: C W U B R G M H S A L
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