Silver bordered and/or joke cards

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{0}{0}{0}
 
 C 
 
Whenever any designer attempts to create a new card, instead create a card that doesn't quite do what they wanted.
 
1 comment
2013-05-10 10:17:05 by Vitenka
 
Devoid
2 comments
last 2016-02-29 13:39:51 by Vitenka
 
 
Discard Datcard: Diss Datcard's discard.
2 comments
last 2013-04-10 13:50:53 by jmgariepy
 B 
Instant
You lose the game.
Actually, forget it. Everyone loses when it comes to Homelands.
3 comments
last 2016-07-18 21:18:11 by Visitor
 M 
Planeswalker – Manatarqua
+1: Until the beginning of your next turn, if damage would be dealt to another permanent you control, prevent all but 1 of that damage.
-1: Put a 2/2 legendary red Dwarf creature token named Varrasta onto the battlefield.
-9: You get an emblem with "If one or more loyalty counters would be placed on a Planeswalker you control, twice that many loyalty counters on placed on it instead."
4
3 comments
last 2015-07-23 13:37:52 by Jack V
 R 
Creature – Construct
Nothing can reduce the power of Mega Craft.
{8}: Mega Craft gains +8/+8 until .. end.. Ah. Oh dear.
There have been been Eldrazi; and Islandfish.
In the past.
But none can surpass the POWER
of Mega Craft
2/2
2 comments
last 2012-11-10 05:44:07 by jmgariepy
 U 
Enchantment
Creature spells cost an additional {1} to cast.



"What's this? A vanilla 2/2 for 3? That's ridiculous!"
Illus. DFR
6 comments
last 2011-02-01 09:35:20 by SadisticMystic
{x}{x}
 
 U 
Instant
Spend only mana in other players' mana pools to cast Snag!.
Roll a die. If you roll an X, you gain X life, draw X cards, and add X mana in any combination of colors to your mana pool.
3 comments
last 2012-04-15 19:26:24 by Vitenka
 R 
Instant
You can only cast Surprise! if a Magic: the Gathering game is already in progress and you are not currently playing or have lost the game.

When Surprise! is cast search your library for ten basic land cards and ten creature cards and put them onto the battlefield. You draw 10 cards, and your life total becomes 20.
Illus. DFR
4 comments
last 2011-01-05 21:50:07 by Jack V
{10}
 
 R 
Creature – Eldrazi
Annihilator 1
Full-Art Landwalk
8/8
1 comment
2017-11-30 23:37:46 by DrugsForRobots
 R 
P – tdpdt
Tiudoijiut – -axxicwtccz, xdoltp-itxaoidtdoidij-o-xtas IO xoa-txxxltt.

Doltp-itxaotxlasxaxxaetcu, zodoltp-itzhxxxltt. Dkl-p-atjljxa, xttcitxaitzoa-topt-datxxxidcctjc-xxxxoetxa-txxatljlitt.
1 comment
2015-12-11 08:29:01 by Urielfury
 M 
Legendary Legendary Legendary Legendary Creature – Angel
Flying, haste, vigilance, trample, lifelink, deathtouch, annihilator 3, protection from spells and abilities opponents control.

Absurd – If a player controls more permanents than you, has more life than you, and has more cards in hand than you, Akroma, Angel of Absurdity, costs {5} less to play.
6/6
6 comments
last 2012-10-05 08:16:49 by Jack V
Polls 43518 adult male angel 5646 671335 answer 3 xlarge
 R 
Creature – Angel
Flying.
Bursting Angel gets -3/-3 for each item of clothing you're wearing and -3/-3 for each DCI judge in the room.
"Will there be another card that encourages you to take your pants off?"
"No."
13/13
7 comments
last 2010-12-18 00:25:35 by Jack V
 C 
Creature – Princess
If you control 7 dwarves, ~ has protection from witches.
1/1
3 comments
last 2012-04-11 03:07:30 by jmgariepy
Creature – Elemental Avatar
When Field of Battle enters the battlefield, Field of Battle becomes the new battlefield and the old one is discarded.

If Field of Battle leaves the battlefield, a new battlefield won't exist until the next untap step.

(Permanents need a battlefield to exist.)
8/8
1 comment
2017-03-24 15:23:40 by Vitenka
 U 
Creature – Hipster
Protection from Square creatures (A square creature has equal power and toughness.)
1/3
1 comment
2014-09-10 07:28:55 by Circeus
 R 
Sorcery
Exile all creatures with only one creature type.
He wouldn't let his sons live at home anymore until they got a bit of class.
2 comments
last 2016-07-18 21:22:56 by Visitor
 U 
Creature – Human Soldier
Hero of the Masses's power and toughness are each equal to the number of spectators watching this game. (Online viewers don't count.)
*/*
 U 
Creature – Loop
When Infinity Looper enters the battlefield exile it, then return it to the battlefield.
2/2
4 comments
last 2013-01-23 07:00:46 by jmgariepy
{1}{w}
 
 U 
Enchantment
Only an even number of creatures can be declared as attacking or blocking.
1 comment
2012-02-20 21:15:16 by Jack V
 U 
Enchantment
Whenever mana empties from a player's mana pool, instead that player also loses 1 life for each one mana lost this way.
 U 
Creature – Knight
Sacrifice Pointless Knight: Counter target spell targetting Pointless Knight.
2/2
3 comments
last 2011-07-31 21:42:56 by Jack V
 U 
Instant
Return all other spells on the stack to their owner's hand.
Remove all damage from all creatures.
1 comment
2012-02-20 21:17:31 by Jack V
 C 
Instant
Judge Call (Pretend to misunderstand a rule. If another player corrects you, you may cast this spell without paying its mana cost this turn.)
Target creature gains protection from the color of your choice until end of turn.
 U 
Creature – Human Cyclist
Soulbond (You may pair this creature with another unpaired creature when either enters the battlefield. They remain paired for as long as you control both of them.)
As long as Tandem Rider is paired with another creature, cards in your hand that share a creature type with either of those creatures have cycling {2}.
1/1
1 comment
2012-10-10 09:35:35 by Alex
 U 
Creature
Protection from 2/2 creatures.
2/2
1 comment
2014-04-27 08:09:26 by Vitenka
 C 
Creature – Pretty
Vainilla is prettier.
2/2
You
{w}
 
Planeswalker
You must attack, if able.
4 comments
last 2013-01-17 12:42:17 by Vitenka
 U 
Instant
Counter target spell that would counter a spell you control.
1 comment
2011-01-21 17:01:55 by Alex
 C 
Creature – Human
Kraken, Leviathan, Octopus, Serpent, Fish, Crocodile, Frog, Nautilus, Pirate, Starfish, Starfish, Squid, and Turtle creatures you control get +1/+1.
T: Tap or untap a creature of one of those types.
1/1
5 comments
last 2012-04-01 08:21:25 by jmgariepy
 R 
Creature – Wizard
When Coastal Wizards comes into play you may cast any number of proxy cards you own from outside the game without paying their mana costs.
Illus. DFR
0/10
 C 
Creature
Whenever a player plays a spell or ability, switch Confounding Turtle's power and toughness until end of turn.
"Left 90. Forward 100. Draw a Sierpinski gasket."
1/4
6 comments
last 2011-01-21 17:01:15 by Alex
Legendary Creature – Jellyfish
Defender
{u}{u},{t}: Draw a few cards and then discard two cards. (A few cards can be any number from two to five.)
Coridra Few-Handed's toughness is equal to the number of cards in your hand. If Coridra's toughness is higher than six, bury Coridra.
2/*
3 comments
last 2015-03-24 17:39:31 by Acilper
 C 
Instant
Counter target spell. If that spell is countered this way, put it onto the stack instead of putting it into its owner's graveyard.
I think we can expect this to be the average power level for countermagic in the foreseeable future.
4 comments
last 2015-03-07 13:33:15 by jmgariepy
 C 
Sorcery
Counter target spell.
 C 
Sorcery
Target player puts the top 5 cards of his or her library into his or her graveyard.
See what i did? the irony is, bot the cards name and ability is shit...
1 comment
2012-10-25 13:58:49 by Link
 C 
Instant
Multiply target creature's power by -2.
The impious anti-paladin reeled over valleys of vertigo. Timon wasn't not sure whether the hex wasn't overkill or not. But considering the stakes, he hardly thought it wasn't inappropriate.
 R 
Creature – Merfolk Lord
Your opponents have +1/+1 and Islandwalk.
...so now it's legal to throw them back into the sea.
2/2
1 comment
2012-06-29 16:08:51 by Vitenka
Hqdefault
 M 
Sorcery
Epic
You may cast sorceries from your hand this turn without paying their mana cost as though they had flash. They cannot be countered.
4 comments
last 2012-08-26 06:35:38 by jmgariepy
 M 
Instant
Draw 9001 cards.
...and promptly vanished in a puff of logic.
2 comments
last 2017-02-15 00:03:49 by Alex
 M 
Enchantment
You can cast premium (shiny) cards at any time you can cast an instant.
1 comment
2014-03-21 14:09:01 by Vitenka
 R 
Enchantment
Return all creatures to their owners' hands except for Krakens, Leviathans, Octopi, and Serpents.
"I can see why this appeals to grammar Nazis."
—Kiora
12 comments
last 2015-04-02 22:35:52 by Samuel
 B 
Enchantment
Each permanent is a copy of each other permanent.
13 comments
last 2012-03-07 11:31:03 by Jack V
 C 
Enchant – World Turtle
{0}: All cards that have "Turtle" anywhere in their text, have "Turtle Walk" instead. Including this one. (This effect doesn't end.) Activate this ability whenever you aren't doing anything else.
3 comments
last 2012-10-11 11:24:34 by Nemica
 M 
Planeswalker – Jace
At the beginning of each player's draw step, if Jace the Mine-Sculptor is untapped, that player draws an additional card.
0 Return target artifact or enchantment card from a graveyard to its owner's hand.
-1, {t}: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool
-12, {t}: Destroy 12 target lands
3
6 comments
last 2012-06-29 18:07:44 by SadisticMystic
Maxresdefault
 R 
Legendary Creature – Moonfolk Wizard
Flying
{1}, Bring it back, sing it back: Bring it back to me.
2/4
1 comment
2015-12-26 21:17:47 by cmeister2
 C 
– Instant
Choose an expansion symbol. Until end of turn, all creature spells with that symbol are countered.
Target block cannot creature this turn.
1 comment
2012-04-07 17:43:38 by Alex
 C 
Creature – Illusion Knight
First strike
When Phantasmal Messenger becomes the target of a spell or ability, transform it.
Though the messenger is fake, the message it carries is real.
3/3
 
 C 
 
3 comments
last 2012-03-28 16:46:09 by Mandroid
 C 
Creature – Wizard
When R&D Scribe enters the battlefield, give target card errata of your choice until end of turn.
Illus. DFR
1/1
1 comment
2011-01-31 12:02:02 by Alex
 U 
Enchantment – Aura
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature is legendary and has horsemanship. (It can't be blocked except by creatures with horsemanship.)
Enchanted creature's expansion symbol becomes the symbol of the Portal: Three Kingdoms expansion.
1 comment
2015-03-02 19:34:12 by movezig5
 U 
Instant
Exile all spells and abilities on the stack, then create copies for each spell and ability exiled this way.
Ok that resolves but only after mine.
2 comments
last 2019-05-07 20:52:46 by Froggychum
{u}{u}
 
 C 
Enchantment
Hexproof
As SOPA enters the battlefield, choose a nonland card. (You don't tell other players the chosen card.)
Whenever a player casts the chosen card, counter that spell and its controller loses 10 life.
 C 
Creature – Sliver
Slivers you control are Slivers in addition to their other types.
1/1
4 comments
last 2015-01-02 07:31:14 by movezig5
{1}{u}
 
Planeswalker
As Spark comes into play, exile a creature you control.
+1: Play an activated ability of exiled creature without paying its cost.
0: Put a creature token into play that has the same creature types, power and toughness as exiled creature.
4
5 comments
last 2012-07-30 12:09:49 by Alex
{1}{u}
 
 C 
Sorcery
Look at the top 10 cards of target opponents library, put them back in random order.
You know what's comming, but you don't know what you'll get.
2 comments
last 2012-09-29 06:20:36 by jmgariepy
 U 
Sorcery
Super Cheap Counterspell is blue.
Counter target spell.
3 comments
last 2016-03-16 11:49:46 by Alex
 U 
Instant
Draw a card from any player's library in any silver border game you can see from your seat, and discard a card from your hand.
When that card would be put in the graveyard, put it on top of it's actual owner's library.
6 comments
last 2014-09-02 13:16:02 by Acilper
 C 
Instant
Judge Call (Pretend to misunderstand a rule. If another player corrects you, you may cast this spell without paying its mana cost this turn.)
Counter target spell.
3 comments
last 2014-08-08 15:49:44 by Circeus
Homarid warrior
 
2/2
2 comments
last 2013-04-19 14:18:17 by jmgariepy
 R 
Creature – Shapeshifter
Whenever a player casts a spell or activates an ability that's not a mana ability, name a creature card. The Schrander becomes that creature and gains this ability. (You can only name creatures legal in the format you're playing.)
2/2
1 comment
2012-07-31 03:58:51 by dude1818
 C 
World Creature – Sgffgddfhh
stroke. call for having 1, 911 ambulance, then spell, cast are you whenever you an scry a aaaaaaaaa!?!!
2/3
Instant
Choose two, I think -
• Counter target spell, probably?
• Return target permanent to it's owner's... hand?
• Tap all creatures your opponents control?
• Draw a card, obviously.
11 comments
last 2017-12-06 00:21:30 by dude1818
 U 
Creature – Female Sliver
When Voluptuous Sliver or another Female Sliver enters the battlefield, it soulbonds with another Male Human.
It is not sure whether slivers evolved to be like humans or vice versa. But one thing is sure, both species love beautiful babes with huge boobs and ass. (Art depicts hot babe in swimsuit at artist's discretion.)
2/2
1 comment
2014-07-03 02:16:07 by amuseum
 U 
Creature – Human Wimp
Shroud
Can only block creatures with flying.
Whenever Wall of whines is dealt damage it deals that much damage to you unless you whine about it.
Käse zum whine?
1/5
draziW namuH – erutaerC
.asrev eciv dna ,- htiw decalper si + fo ecnatsni hcaE

(.efil fo ssol sesuac egamad) .tsol daetsni si deniag efil yna dna ,efil niag ot reyalp taht sesuac daetsni efil fo ssoL

hsalF
2/2
3 comments
last 2014-03-04 08:30:25 by movezig5
 U 
Instant
Destroy target black creature or creature Betrayal couldn't target. Betrayal may target those cards.
1 comment
2010-11-11 22:39:07 by Jack V
 R 
Creature – Demon
Flying, trample.

At the beginning of your upkeep, pay 3 life and sacrifice 2 creatures. If you can't Big Scary Demon deals 10 damage to you.
"Why do I cost so much and still have severe drawbacks, you ask? Because I'm a 10/10 flyin', tramplin' DEMON that's why."
Illus. DFR
10/10
{b}{b}{b}{b}{b}{b}{b}{b}
 
 M 
Sorcery
Destroy everything.
 C 
Creature – Vampire Lizard
2/2
2 comments
last 2013-10-04 19:35:30 by Jack V
 R 
Instant
Put the top X cards of target player's library into their graveyard where X is the number of cards in their hand, then exile their graveyard.
3 comments
last 2012-02-20 23:51:29 by Jack V
In the year 3000 maro
 R 
Creature – Evilmental
Evil Maro's power and toughness are both equal to your maximum hand size, minus the number of cards in your hand. (Evil Maro is more powerful in some formats.)
"Magic players love to copy decks, so the next set features an artifact that copies an entire deck!"
*/*
5 comments
last 2015-01-02 07:34:23 by movezig5
 C 
Creature – Pantera
Respectwalk. (What do you say?)
Respectwalk. (Are you talking to me?)
Illus. Pantera
2/2
1 comment
2013-01-22 22:24:07 by raggarn12345
 M 
Sorcery
Destroy target creature with indestructible and hexproof. You lose life equal to your life total.
Starting next year, the game will be called Creatures: The Creaturing.
7 comments
last 2015-01-10 18:07:45 by LivesByProxy
Legendary Creature – Demon
Flying, Indestructible
1/1
14 comments
last 2017-12-12 14:49:21 by Jack V
 C 
Sorcery
Judge Call (Pretend to misunderstand a rule. If another player corrects you, you may cast this spell without paying its mana cost this turn.)
Target player loses 3 life.
Funeral march
 M 
Legendary Creature – Savior
Banding, Protection from Demons and Non-Believers
Creatures you control gain "{t}: Carry On."
When My Chemical Romance was a minor, his father took him into the city, scry 2 a Marching Band.
3/3
2 comments
last 2012-03-28 16:43:25 by Mandroid
 C 
Creature – Specter
Flying.
Needle Specter deals damage to creatures in the form of -1/-1 counters and damage to players in the form of them discarding that many cards.
2/2
2 comments
last 2011-02-03 09:06:29 by Alex
Enchantment
Exile all permanents you control. Whenever you finish a page of your essay you may return one exiled permanent to the battlefield under your control.
 C 
Creature – Rat
Pointless Rats gets +1/+1 for each card called Pointless Rats in your sideboard.
1/1
7 comments
last 2011-09-09 11:06:55 by jmgariepy
 U 
Instant
Destroy target creature, put that creature under the table
3 comments
last 2018-06-12 12:46:56 by Alex
 C 
Instant
You win the game.
5 comments
last 2015-01-02 07:37:19 by movezig5
7168860
 U 
Sorcery
Target opponent discards a card, and you draw two cards.
Nothing is sacred to the rats. It's a good thing, too.
2 comments
last 2013-04-19 15:26:41 by SadisticMystic
Enchantment
Whenever a player loses the game, you lose the game.
{3}{b}: Target player gains control of The Game.
1 comment
2013-09-06 12:47:38 by Jack V
 C 
Instant
Destroy target creature if the square root of the sum of its power squared and and it toughness squared is an integer. It can't be regenerated. Its controller loses life equal to that integer.
"sqrt( P^2 + T^2 )? What is this — I don't even?" – Goblin mathematician
2 comments
last 2012-02-20 19:55:27 by dude1818
Sorcery
Play a single round of musical chairs with all players removing your own seat. (All players get up and circle the play area until someone stops the music. Then, everyone takes a free seat.) Each player controls the player on whose seat they sat down during that player's next turn. You control the player left without seat during their next turn.
1 comment
2017-12-01 06:21:51 by SecretInfiltrator
 C 
Sorcery
Each player loses the game.
2 comments
last 2012-10-11 08:30:46 by Mandroid
 C 
Creature – Thing
Things are red.
When Anything enters the battlefield, choose a Thing and return it to its owners hand unless its controller pays {1}.
Nyuk nyuk nyuk
1/1
1 comment
2011-07-13 12:38:19 by Vitenka
 C 
Instant
Bolt, Bolt, Bolt deals 3 damage to target creature or player.

Bolt, Bolt, Bolt deals 3 damage to target creature or player.

Bolt, Bolt, Bolt deals 3 damage to target creature or player.
"Good game."
Illus. DFR
1330449 1255064739
 M 
Legendary Creature – Cowboy
All creatures are the same. Only the names can change.
Bon Jovi gets +2/+2 when attached to an Artifact Creature – Horse.
If a player can, they must target Bon Jovi, dead, or on the battlefield.
6/6
 M 
Sorcery
Flip target nontoken permanent in the air. (If it's faced down, it is a 2/2 colorless creature with no creature types. If it's a double-faced card, it transforms to the side that is face-up.)
{r}
 
 C 
Instant
Diss deals 2 damage to target creature. If it's a [Square] creature, Diss deals 4 damage to it instead. (A square creature has equal power and toughness.)
 
Docile Ironhide can't attack or block.
Shroud
{1}: Destroy Docile Ironhide.
0/8
2 comments
last 2013-09-06 17:03:55 by Alex
Legendary Legendary Creature Creature – Hound Hound
Doublstrike, doublestrike

Double Dog, Dared counts as two creatures.
2/2
 R 
Legendary Creature – Student
Enjolras, Student Agitator is Atog, he is a Ghast. (Is Marius in love at last?)
Enjolras has never seen him {u}{u} and {r}{r}.
3/2
5 comments
last 2011-02-07 10:31:43 by Chris
 R 
Creature – Wall
Flash, Defender
Expurgate can block any number of creatures.
X is equal to the number of attacking creatures that Expurgate does not block this turn.
0/3
3 comments
last 2014-01-28 00:44:24 by Vitenka
 R 
Enchantment
All creatures have "{t}: Fight target creature."
1 comment
2012-02-20 20:55:29 by Jack V
Enchantment
{1}{r}{r}: Play musical chairs with all of your opponents (Have a Judge play the music). Until the beginning of your next upkeep, if a source controlled by the winner of that game would deal damage, it deals double that damage instead. Activate this ability only once per turn and only when you could cast a sorcery.
4 comments
last 2017-12-01 06:48:08 by Mal
Sorcery
Split Second

Target game loses target player. That player then joins a different game. Cast Get Outta Here only if there are three or more players playing a game and two or more games being played.
 R 
Sorcery
You ask target player whether he or she agrees to have you pee on him or her or to have him or her pee on you. If that player doesn't agree, put X colorless artifact tokens named Gold onto the battlefield. They have "Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool."
1 comment
2014-02-27 23:25:01 by Link
Enchant – World
Tribute (When this comes into play, opponents may place +1/+1 counters upon it)

This is not an angel, it counts as a human.
Rock
1 comment
2014-02-26 11:43:40 by Vitenka
 U 
Colour indicator R Instant
Madness {r}
Choose a number. The controller of target blocked or blocking creature reveals the top card of his or her library. If that card has converted mana cost equal to the chosen number, gain control of that creature.
3 comments
last 2012-09-05 10:20:29 by Alex
 C 
Sorcery
Judge Call (Pretend to misunderstand a rule. If another player corrects you, you may cast this spell without paying its mana cost this turn.)
Lightning Fart deals 2 damage to target creature or player.
 C 
Creature – Human Troll
Obvious Troll is obvious.
Obvious Troll must be replied to each turn if able.
Whenever Obvious Troll is banned, return it to the battlefield behind a proxy.
You know it to be a troll, but when you read its posts, what you know won't matter much at all.
--Pol Jamaar, Trollbait
1/1
4 comments
last 2014-08-12 23:43:11 by jmgariepy
 C 
Instant
Old Fling deals 2 damage to target player.
Old Fling deals 5 damage to that player instead if you've been in a relationship with him or her.
3 comments
last 2013-12-31 12:14:34 by Circeus
 C 
Instant
Power Spike deals 1 damage to target creature or player.
{r}, {t}: Power Spike deals 1 damage to target creature or player. Activate this ability only while Power Spike is on the stack.
3 comments
last 2012-03-06 17:42:16 by Alex
 M 
Creature – BBEEAARR
Red is OBVIOUSLY now the most broken color.
2/2
The avengers nick fury 2
Creature – Human Director
Other Director creatures you control get +1/0 and have haste.
If a Director you control would assemble an Avenger, it assembles two Avengers instead.
"There was an idea – to bring together a group of remarkable people."
3 comments
last 2016-07-18 21:51:49 by Brox.P
 R 
Sorcery
Affinity for lands, convoke, delve (This spell costs {1} less for each land you control, each untapped creature you tap, and each card you exile from your graveyard as you cast this.)
Add X red mana to your mana pool.
5 comments
last 2012-08-05 05:15:37 by jmgariepy
Sorcery
Each creature fights it's controller (Each deals damage equal to it's power to the other)
2 comments
last 2019-06-30 11:57:13 by Izaac
{r}
 
Yo dawg xhibit 13
 U 
Enchantment – Aura
Enchant enchant creature.
Creatures enchanted by the enchantment this enchant enchant creature enchants gain first strike and double strike, so they can strike while they strike.
I heard you like enchantments.
11 comments
last 2012-10-13 05:33:35 by jmgariepy
 M 
Creature – Human Warrior
When Amazon Starbait enters the battlefield, write a 'G' next to its casting cost. Amazon Starbait's casting cost is increased by {g} forever. (Forever ever.)
"Son wanted this so bad. Looks great! Sure he'll be playing with this for years to come. ★★★★★!"
6/5
3 comments
last 2018-01-08 23:53:04 by SecretInfiltrator
 C 
Legendary Creature – avatar avatar
Avatar avatar's power and toughness are equal to the total power and total toughness of all creatures you control.
*/*
5 comments
last 2011-01-26 15:06:57 by Jack V
 C 
Creature – Rabbit
When Bunnybunnybunnybunnybunnybunnybunnybunnybunnybunnybunnybunny, Bunny. deals damage to a player, remove all counters from target permanent.
Jace has carrots!
1/1
1 comment
2011-06-20 09:28:44 by Alex
 C 
Creature – Bear
Dress-up Bear is all the colors of the sleeve it's in. (It's colorless if unsleeved.)
2/2
1 comment
2013-12-30 21:02:02 by Circeus
 R 
Creature – Plant Elemental
Deathtouch, double strike, forestwalk, haste, hexproof, lifelink, menace, protection from creatures controlled by players not wearing green, prowess, reach, trample, vigilance
Whenever you need to look at reminder text for any of Evergreen Treant’s abilities, it deals 3 damage to you.
2/2
1 comment
2016-08-16 21:39:50 by Eldritch_Aipom
 U 
Creature – Elemental
Trample
If a player in another game you can see has 6 or more lands on the battlefield, flip Haven Guard.
4/4
Outskirts of Haven
 
Land
{t}: Add {1} to your mana pool and {g}{g}{g} to the mana pool of another target player in a game you can see. (You cannot be the target of this ability.)
2 comments
last 2015-01-27 19:49:55 by Acilper
Creature – Avatar
20/20
6 comments
last 2015-09-25 23:51:12 by Alex
 U 
Sorcery
Each creature chooses a creature type and becomes that creature type.
6 comments
last 2012-10-24 14:06:12 by Link
{x}{y}{Z}{g}
 
 U 
Sorcery
Create X 1/1 green Hydra creature tokens with Y +Z/+Z counters on them.
"If a nose is cut off, two more shall take its place!"
2 comments
last 2018-01-09 08:34:18 by jmgariepy
Creature – Elemental
All your forests tap for an extra {g}
Haste, Vigilance
At the beginning of your upkeep, create a 3/3 elemental creature token with vigilance and haste
When this creature dies, creature a copy of it at the beginning of your next upkeep
Oh, and she's even better than this
3/3
3 comments
last 2019-05-29 15:48:31 by Izaac
 C 
Instant
Judge Call (Pretend to misunderstand a rule. If another player corrects you, you may cast this spell without paying its mana cost this turn.)
Target creature gets +2/+2 and gains trample until end of turn.
 C 
Enchantment – Aura
Enchanted creature gets +2/+2
Totem Armor
If enchanted creature is enchanted by a second aura, it has "{r}, {t}: Deal 1 damage to target creature or player."
2 comments
last 2012-02-20 23:26:44 by Alex
 C 
Enchantment – Aura
Whenever enchanted creature attacks or a creature blocks it, that creature's controller reveals the top card of their library. If it's a land card, remove that creature from combat.
1 comment
2012-02-20 20:54:27 by Jack V
 C 
Instant
Put a token onto the battlefield that’s a copy of a creature with at least one female in its art.
If you and at least one other player disagree whether there is a female in that creature’s art, exile that creature instead unless a third party agrees that there is at least one female in its art.
2 comments
last 2016-08-20 05:51:23 by Aaron Gertler
 U 
Creature – Troll
When Pie-Tossing Troll enters the battlefield, it fights target creature. Then sacrifice Pie-Tossing Troll.
π/π
1 comment
2018-03-28 12:42:43 by jmgariepy
 C 
Creature – Insect
Reach
Semantic Butterfly can only be blocked by creatures with flying or reach.
1/1
8 comments
last 2016-03-08 21:07:19 by dude1818
Human
 C 
Legendary Creature – Human
The Human League counts as a Waitress in a Cocktail Bar. (That much is true.)
{2}{g} Suspend – 5 long years
When The Human League attacks, put a token sorcery on the stack called "Don't You Want Me, Baby?" which reads "Target creature must block The Human League."
5/5
 U 
Creature – Elephant
When Vainglorious Elephant is blocking or blocked by a Rat, return Vainglorious Elephant to its owner's hand.
6/6
3 comments
last 2014-05-01 09:44:17 by jmgariepy
 C 
Creature – Equipment, Wolf
You may choose not to untap Wearwolf in your untap phase.
{t}:While Wearwolf is tapped, target creature has +1/+1 and {g}:Regenerate.
2/2
6 comments
last 2012-01-18 05:43:26 by jmgariepy
MIA
{1}{w}{u}
 
 R 
Instant
Put target non-land permanent into its owner's sideboard.
2 comments
last 2019-08-05 10:23:35 by Vitenka
 M 
Enchantment Enchantment
Permanents you control are enchantments in addition to their other types and have indestructible.
The unique magic of Theros affects not only those living in it, but also itself.
1 comment
2014-02-01 00:50:04 by amuseum
 M 
Legendary Creature – Spy Illusion
Hexproof, Menace
When you cast Deckrunner Jerix, shuffle it face-up into target opponent's library. When that opponent would draw Deckrunner Jerix, instead they put it onto the battlefield under your control and each player draws a card.
9/9
2 comments
last 2018-01-05 07:34:52 by Vitenka
{2}{u}{b}
 
 C 
Enchantment
Whenever a player speaks, that player loses 2 life.
 M 
Sorcery – Planeswalker
Destroy target creature with converted mana cost 3 or less. Put a loyalty counter on Angry Minotaur

Planeswalker 1- (After your draw step, you may have this effect happen unless your opponent has dealt X damage where X is the number of loyalty counters on this card and then has you gain X life) Target opponent discards a card and loses 2 life. Put a loyalty counter on Angry Minotaur.
4 comments
last 2018-09-14 19:04:33 by SecretInfiltrator
 R 
Legendary Creature – Troll
Protection from Horses

All creatures lose horsemanship and can't have or gain horsemanship.
5/5
{g}{r}{g}
 
 R 
Creature – Mutant Ninja Turtle
Teenage (This creature enters the battlefield with thirteen age counters on it. At the beginning of your upkeep, put an age counter on it. Then, if it has twenty or more age counters on it, sacrifice it.)
4/4
 U 
Creature – Wolf
Aww, it's purring.
7/3
2 comments
last 2012-01-19 13:44:15 by Alex
Enchantment
Each player who didn't contribute to the conversation last turn can't cast spells.
 C 
Enchantment
When you successfully cast Courser's Accordion, fold it in half so only the name and cost are visible.
When an opponent declares an attack against you, unfold Courser's Accordion to reveal the text box, and put a 3/3 green Centaur token onto the battlefield.
When Courser's Accordion is unfolded, ut a 3/3 green Centaur token onto the battlefield at the beginning of each upkeep.
1 comment
2014-03-12 23:14:57 by ChalkdustOnline
 M 
Legendary Enchantment
Cumulative upkeep — Ruin MAGIC forever.
All creatures get +1/+1 and all spells cost {1} less to cast for each age counter on Mirari's Power Creep.
"Let them complain. As long as the addictive ink is working, we can do anything we want."
2 comments
last 2013-10-10 02:08:07 by movezig5
 C 
Creature – Snake
Plainswalk.
I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry.
2/2
2 comments
last 2011-08-07 15:37:57 by Link
 R 
Sorcery
Shuffle a token you own from outside the game into your library face-up. When it's the top card of your library, put it onto the battlefield.
Marit Lage didn't know who this 'Fblthp' was, but he seemed to know what he was doing.
 R 
Instant
Target player can't play spells this turn.
Neither player can speak for 2 minutes.
"Hi, dad! It's been a while... Um, maybe we should talk outside the village."
-Avacyn
 C 
Sorcery
Split Second.
Exile target permanent face down.
"Take THAT. And THAT. And THAT AND THAT AND THAT AND THAT."
2 comments
last 2010-12-18 00:21:59 by Jack V
Stop obesity mcdonalds 30870646 400 282
 R 
Enchantment
At the beginning of your upkeep, put a +1/+1 counter on each creature you control. Then, destroy all creatures you control with four or more +1/+1 counters.
I'm lovin it.
5 comments
last 2012-10-22 10:05:29 by Alex
Sorcery
Destroy all of the things.
this way, I won't have to clean them.
7 comments
last 2012-08-16 16:44:23 by dude1818
Instant
The Converted Mana Cost target non-permanent you control becomes X until end of turn.
It doesn't actually cost any more or any less, but with some clever wording, it seems so.
{2}{w}{b}
 
45625545
 M 
Legendary Creature – Champions
Killer, bands with Bowies
If this card is not on the battlefield this time before the next turn, Carry On, Carry On. (as if nothing really mattered.)
4/4
1 comment
2012-04-08 04:47:20 by jmgariepy
 R 
Enchantment
At the end of each turn, for each creature, that creature's controller chooses another creature, with lower power if possible. Then exile the creature which was chosen the greatest number of times.
"... Goodbye."
2 comments
last 2012-07-30 19:18:30 by dude1818
 R 
Sorcery
Destroy target silver-bordered permanent in any game you can see from your seat and all permanents with that name within a ten-foot radius of that permanent.
During the collision of the shards, entire games of MAGIC disappeared without a trace.
6 comments
last 2013-10-11 04:25:16 by movezig5
 R 
Enchantment
Spells you cast have infect. (They deal damage to creatures in the form of -1/-1 counters and to players in the form of poison counters.)
8 comments
last 2012-03-28 16:36:43 by Mandroid
Creature – Pig
Sacrifice an Ox or a Cleric: Flesheating Pig gets +3/+3 until end of turn.
This little piggy had roast beef,
And this little piggy had nun.
2/2
1 comment
2012-09-23 07:20:14 by Chris
{g}{u}
 
 C 
Aura – Enchantment
Target creature is a 1/2 duck.
(It is no longer a creature.)
4 comments
last 2011-02-01 12:52:59 by Vitenka
 U 
Creature – Bird Ox
Flying
Whenever an opponent laughs, put a +1/+1 counter on Parrot Ox.
"A parrot-ox, a parrot-ox, a most amusing parrot-ox! Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, a parrot-ox!" – William Schwenck Gilbert.
1/1
2 comments
last 2013-02-19 14:00:13 by Vitenka
Instant
Take an additional turn right now. After the additional turn, continue on from the phase or step when this spell was cast. (If you cast this during your opponent's draw step, when your additional turn ends, it is the beginning of your opponent's draw step.)
1 comment
2015-01-25 00:00:08 by movezig5
 M 
Sorcery
Exchange all cards in target nonempty zone you control and all cards in target nonempty zone an opponent controls. (The zones are ante, battlefield, command, exile, graveyard, hand, library, and stack.)
4 comments
last 2012-05-23 01:42:15 by SadisticMystic
 R 
Creature
The first instant or sorcery spell you cast from your graveyard each turn has flashback. The flashback cost is equal to its mana cost.
4/4
Sorcery
Flip a coin. If you win, target player wins the game. If you lose, target player loses the game.
"Tell ya what, let's flip for it. Heads I win, tails you lose. How's that sound?"
 M 
Sorcery
Nothing happens.
Very high cost, Extremly bad (lack of) effect, sorcery speed, AND NO ART!!!
6 comments
last 2011-01-17 09:06:52 by Alex
 M 
Creature – Goblin Warrior
When Poopoo Buttstinker, Khan of Flatulence enters the battlefield, each player discards a card and sacrifices a creature.
Creatures can't block Poopoo Buttstinker, Khan of Flatulence unless they cover their noses.
BRG. The Bowel Colonies
Dragon aspect: Defecation
Symbol: Butt of the Dragon
Khan: Poopoo Buttstinker. Goblin
3/4
7 comments
last 2014-08-12 05:31:03 by movezig5
 U 
Instant
Blightning Helix deals 3 damage to target creature or player. You gain 3 life.
2 comments
last 2011-02-01 19:15:32 by Alex
 T 
Enchantment
All myr gain +{u}/+{r} and are white.
1 comment
2011-07-19 15:55:14 by Vitenka
 R 
Enchantment
Aura cards have overload. The overload cost is equal to twice the spell's mana cost. (An overloaded Aura is attached to everything it can enchant when it is cast cast.)
7 comments
last 2013-03-29 03:44:37 by jmgariepy
 M 
Sorcery
When you play Card Advantage, you win the game.


"Now that's card advantage."
Illus. DFR
1 comment
2011-01-06 09:20:00 by Chris
 R 
World Enchantment
Replace all instances of 'Your' in the text boxes of cards with 'Our'
Soviet Anthem Plays
1 comment
2018-06-16 18:29:20 by Froggychum
 R 
Instant
Each player creates a D&D character with level equal to his or her life total in Magic, then stops playing Magic and begin a game of D&D using those characters.
"Rocks fall, everyone dies, no saving throws."
Illus. DFR
9 comments
last 2012-03-28 16:40:26 by Mandroid
 M 
Legendary Creature – Human Warrior Scout Praetor
First strike, vigilance, flash, swampwalk, trample

Metalcraft – Creatures you control get +3/+0 as long as you control three or more artifacts.

You can't get poison counters.

Creatures you control can't have -1/-1 counters placed on them.

Creatures your opponents control lose infect.

Other creatures you control get +2/+2.

Creatures your opponents control get -2/-2.

At the beginning of your end step, draw seven cards.

Each opponent's maximum hand size is reduced by seven.

At the beginning of your upkeep, return target creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield.

At the beginning of each opponent's upkeep, that player sacrifices a creature.

Creatures you control have haste.

Creatures your opponents control enter the battlefield tapped.

Whenever you tap a land for mana, add one mana to your mana pool of any type that land produced.

Whenever an opponent taps a land for mana, that land doesn't untap during its controller's next untap step.
99/99
 U 
Enchantment
At the beginning of your upkeep, each player changes places with the player to his or her left. Each player plays with that player's cards (including his or her hand, deck, and all permanents he or she controls).
Illus. DFR
4 comments
last 2011-01-10 14:35:35 by Alex
 M 
Enchantment – Aura
Enchant Creature
Switch enchanted creature's power and toughness as long as it has flying.
When The Ultimate Rules Advisor Nightmare enters the battlefield, if enchanted creature is red, put a +1/+0 counter on it.
Enchanted creature gets +1/+3 as long as it has trample.
Enchanted creature is X/Y, where X is its converted mana cost and Y is the number of types it has.
Enchanted creature has flying as long as it has power greater than 3.
Enchanted creature loses trample as long as it is not red.
As long as enchanted creature has toughness greater than 3 and is a treefolk, it's green. Otherwise it's red.
Enchanted creature is a Mountain Land and an Equipment Artifact in addition to its types.
As long as enchanted creature's power is greater than its toughness, replace all instances of "red" in its text with "green".
You control enchanted creature.
As The Ultimate Rules Advisor Nightmare enters the battlefield, choose target creature. Enchanted creature is a copy of that creature.
1 comment
2012-05-16 08:31:31 by cmeister2
 R 
Enchantment
Whenever an opponent or a card that opponent owns bumps into a permanent on the battlefield you control, choose one —
• Untap that permanent.
• That permanent deals damage to target opponent equal to its converted mana cost.
• You may activate one of that permanent's activated abilities without paying its cost.
1 comment
2014-10-08 22:27:28 by ChalkdustOnline
{w/b}{w/b}
 
 R 
Instant
Target player cannot concede the game this turn.
Draw a card.
"Suck it, comp. rule 101.1!"
—movezig5
14 comments
last 2015-03-05 05:19:17 by movezig5
Instant
You may cast this spell after you cast another spell. (You still have to pay for it.)

Each opponent loses 1 life, gain 1 life.

Extort
1 comment
2015-12-21 07:21:38 by Urielfury
2
 R 
Sorcery
Madness {2}{r}
Untap and gain control of target creature. It gains haste until end of turn.
SPARTA!!!
{2}{r}{r}{r}
 
Kingleonidas
 R 
Sorcery
Destroy all ambassadors.
1 comment
2011-11-13 11:25:55 by jmgariepy
{w}
 
 U 
Instant
Put a 0/1 white Legendary Human creature token into play, named "Bruce".
Wane
{w}
 
 U 
Instant
Destroy target enchantment.
2 comments
last 2014-11-21 09:49:47 by Jack V
{1}{g}
 
 C 
Instant
Gain 1 life.
Draw a card.
Fuse – You may play one or both sides of this card.
Graze
{r}
 
 C 
Instant
Deal 1 damage to target creature with toughness 2. That creature can't attack or block this turn.
2 comments
last 2013-10-15 06:50:38 by movezig5
 R 
Artifact
Whenever a player begins a task, Angst of Mishra deals 2 damage to that player
"Not easy being a teenager"
-Mishra
1 comment
2018-06-05 20:32:47 by wurms
 M 
Artifact
{t}, Set Blackest Lotus on fire: Add {x} to your mana pool where X is any number you choose.
Illus. DFR
3 comments
last 2011-01-21 15:03:34 by Jack V
Artifact – Equipment
Blade of Overcompensation enters the battlefield with X Charge counters on it.
Blade of Overcompensation's converted mana cost is equal to the number of Charge counters on it.
Equipped creature gets +X/+X, where X equals Blade of Overcompensation's converted mana cost, and Vigilance.
{x}: Attach Blade of Overcompensation to target creature with converted mana cost X-1. The cost is not equal to the number of Charge counters on Blade of Overcompensation.
1 comment
2015-02-01 14:33:39 by Alex
 U 
Artifact Creature – Scarecrow Ninja
Vigilance, trample, haste, provoke, defender
Ninjutsu {2}{g}
4/4
2 comments
last 2012-01-13 19:56:25 by Link
 R 
Legendary Artifact
If you would play Rock, Paper, Scissors, you may throw with an extra hand and ignore one of those results.
"Krark would always throw two rocks. According to him, 'Nothing beats rock!' I miss him."
--Squeee, an Other Goblin Cabin Hand
2 comments
last 2018-01-07 09:24:34 by Vitenka
 M 
Artifact Creature – Masticore
You don't draw cards. When Molten-Tail Masticore comes into play, you win the game.
4/4
1 comment
2011-05-14 20:24:44 by jmgariepy
 R 
Legendary Artifact – Button
{1}{t}: Until the beginning of your next turn, nothing you say or do can trigger Gotcha abilities.
Gotcha – Whenever an opponent says "Gotcha", you may say "Gotcha". If you do, return Mute Button from your graveyard to your hand.
1 comment
2015-01-26 04:39:20 by movezig5
 R 
Legendary Artifact
4, {t}: Exile all cards in all zones. (If a card is already exiled, exile it again.)
Just be grateful we let you keep the cards. An early version of this card involved a paper shredder.
1 comment
2015-02-05 15:46:25 by movezig5
Artifact
{t}, Flip a coin: Choose target creature you don't control. If you won the flip, tap that creature, and if the coin was a nickel, it doesn't untap during its controller's next untap step. If you lost the flip, untap that creature, and if the coin was a nickel, it gains Vigilance until end of turn.
 U 
Artifact
When a player swears,put a charge counter on Swear Jar.
Remove a charge counter from Swear Jar: add one mana of any color to your mana pool.
4 comments
last 2017-02-15 10:54:00 by Vitenka
2 comments
last 2012-10-29 10:17:30 by Alex
{2}
 
 C 
Tribal Artifact – Cat Carrier
You may choose not to untap The Box during your untap step.

{t}: Exile target Cat creature for as long as The Box is tapped and on the battlefield.
Nice kitty, time for your injections!
8 comments
last 2012-10-11 09:31:15 by Mandroid
 R 
Artifact
Whether a creature attacks or blocks, and what it attacks, and which creature it blocks, are chosen at random from the valid possibilities.
 C 
Land
{t}, Sacrifice Eldorado: Look at the top ten cards of your library. You may put a basic land card from them onto the battlefield untapped. Put the rest on the bottom of your library in any order.
3 comments
last 2011-02-04 15:48:37 by Jack V
 C 
Land
T, sacrifice Expansive grasslands: Search your library for five basic land cards of any one basic land type, reveal them, put one onto the battlefield (untapped) and shuffle the rest back into your library.
2 comments
last 2011-01-28 22:58:11 by Alex
 U 
Land
Game Theoretiffic Expanse comes into play tapped unless the average secondary market value of Game Theoretiffic Expanse is less than $2.

{t}: Add {w} or {u} to your mana pool.
7 comments
last 2012-10-11 09:27:41 by Mandroid
 R 
Land
{t}: Choose two —
• Add {W 1/2} to your mana pool.
• Add {U 1/2} to your mana pool.
• Add {B 1/2}} to your mana pool.
• Add {R 1/2} to your mana pool.
• Add {G 1/2} to your mana pool.
1 comment
2017-12-01 09:52:51 by KeresAcheron
 R 
Land Ceature – Swamp Spirit
(Nether Regions isn't a spell, it's affected by summoning sickness, and it has "{t}: Add {b} to your mana pool.")
When Nether Regions enters the battlefield, sacrifice it unless you pay {b}.
Gotcha — Whenever an opponent snickers, if Nether Regions is in your graveyard, you may return Nether Regions to the battlefield.
What are you smiling about?
1/1
1 comment
2013-10-09 06:01:18 by movezig5
 U 
Land
{t}: Add {1} to your mana pool.

{t}: Add {b} or {b} to your mana pool. Activate this ability only if you control a Swamp.
3 comments
last 2014-02-27 04:37:52 by movezig5
Plane – Boeing
{1}: Target creature gains flying until end of turn. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery.
Whenever you roll {chaos}, destroy all creatures with flying. Then planeswalk.
5 comments
last 2012-05-27 23:12:57 by Alex

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