SM Joke Card Dump: Virtual Booster

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Printable
This booster was generated with modern collation since the cardset contains mythics: 1 rare / mythic, 3 uncommons, 10 commons, 1 basic land.
You could alternatively have 15 random cards regardless of rarity.
Energizer Bunny
{r}{r}
 
 C 
Ongoing Creature – Rabbit
(Energizer Bunny keeps going and going...)
Energizer Bunny enters the battlefield with 20 charge counters on it.
When Energizer Bunny has no charge counters on it, go to the store and buy a new one.
Illus. Energizer Holdings, Inc.
2/2
 
Quicksliver Gargantuan
{5}{u}{u}
 
 R 
Creature – Sliver Shapeshifter
Flash
You may have Quicksliver Gargantuan enter the battlefield as a copy of any Sliver creature on the battlefield, except it's 7/7 and has "Sliver cards that aren't on the battlefield have flash."
7/7
Umezawa's Kitty
{b}
 
 U 
Legendary Creature – Cat
Whenever Umezawa's Kitty deals combat damage, put two yarn counters on it.
Remove a yarn counter from Umezawa's Kitty: Choose one — Umezawa's Kitty gets +2/+2 until end of turn, or put a 1/1 black Rat Zombie creature token onto the battlefield, or target opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life.
0/2
Foalslayer
{3}{b}
 
 U 
Creature – Demon
Delve
If a creature card with horsemanship was exiled with Foalslayer's delve ability, Foalslayer has horsemanship. The same is true for "When this creature dies, you gain 1 life" and "{1}{r}, {t}: Target Dwarf gains mountainwalk until end of turn."
3/3
Grizzled Janitor
{w}
 
 U 
Creature – Human Sponge
You may cast Grizzled Janitor during your cleanup step, but not at any other time. (You can't cast spells during the cleanup step unless a triggered ability or state-based action takes place at that time.)
"Cleanup in aisle...oh, to hell with it."
3/3
One with Something
{w}
 
 C 
Instant
Draw your hand. (Lay it flat against a sheet of paper and run along the outline with a pen or pencil, then color it and show it to your mommy.)
Tutu Cat
{1}{g}
 
 C 
Creature – Cat
Tutu Cat is 2/2.
I CAN HAZ PLUS SEVNTEEN PLUS SEVNTEEN? BUT NOT IF I HAZ TO WEAR DIS HUMEOWIATING DRESS.
19/19
Magikarp
{4}{u}
 
 C 
Creature – Fish
Evolve, evolve, evolve, evolve, evolve, evolve, evolve
"...Karp?"
Illus. Ken Sugimori
0/1
Energizer Bunny
{r}{r}
 
 C 
Ongoing Creature – Rabbit
(Energizer Bunny keeps going and going...)
Energizer Bunny enters the battlefield with 20 charge counters on it.
When Energizer Bunny has no charge counters on it, go to the store and buy a new one.
Illus. Energizer Holdings, Inc.
2/2
Five-Dollar Wrench
{b}
 
 C 
Sorcery
Destroy target creature that has a card encoded on it.
"We may not be able to break your secrets, but we can certainly break you."
--Teysa Karlov
Pinocchioken
{g}{w}
 
 C 
Sorcery
Target token becomes a REAL CARD!
Just kidding. This card will now grow until it gets to be one of those 6x9 oversize cards.
Mirrodin's Coors
{6}
 
 C 
Artifact Creature – Ooze
Hexproof (This permanent is 3% alcohol by volume.)
Whenever Mirrodin's Coors deals damage to a creature, tap that creature and it doesn't untap during its controller's next untap step.
{6}: Recycle Mirrodin's Coors. (Sacrifice it. If you do, put a token onto the battlefield that's a copy of it.)
2/6
Nesting Sliver
{4}{g}
 
 C 
Creature – Sliver
All Slivers have "All Slivers get +0/+1 and have this ability" and this ability.
1/1
Longing Memory
{u}{u}
 
 C 
Enchantment
{u}{u}: Counter target spell. Activate this ability only any time you could cast an interrupt. (You could cast interrupts between August 1993 and April 1999.)
Mountain
 
 B 
Basic Land – Mountain

Energizer Bunny (common, foil)
Quicksliver Gargantuan (rare)
Umezawa's Kitty (uncommon)
Foalslayer (uncommon)
Grizzled Janitor (uncommon)
One with Something (common)
Tutu Cat (common)
Magikarp (common)
Energizer Bunny (common)
Five-Dollar Wrench (common)
Pinocchioken (common)
Mirrodin's Coors (common)
Nesting Sliver (common)
Longing Memory (common)
Mountain (basic)