[NONCANON] My Random Shit: Virtual Booster

Swampburn    R  Enchantment – Aura Curse Enchant player At the beginning of enchanted players upkeep, they lose 1 life for each player that controls a Swamp	Competitive Eater    U  Creature – Human Fatso Haste Whenever Competitive Eater attacks you may pay if you do, destroy target Food 2/1	Boom    U  Instant Shock any target Explosion    U  Instant Deal 20 damage to any target	Absorption Sponge    U  Creature – Plant Whenever you would be dealt damage, redirect that damage to Absorption Sponge. : You gain 1 life. Active this ability only if you control another white or green creature. 0/2
Stack Clog    C  Artifact – Unspeakable Split Second Stack Clog does not resolve : Eat wet hair, and smell dog farts, lose 5 life, Stack Clog resolves, only opponents may activate this ability, and only if Stack Clog is on the stack	Get Rekt    C  Instant As Get Rekt is cast, any player may pay to counter it Target player gets Rekt	Gold Bar A    C  Artifact Gold Bar is Gold : Target player gives you $45.00 CAD, if they do, sacrifice Gold Bar, this may not be countered or prevented	Tweet    C  Instant As an additional cost to cast Tweet, pay , , or Create a 1/1 blue Twitterbyrd creature token with Flying and ", Tweet: Draw a card"
Char    C  Instant Char pings any target, it becomes black until end of turn	Pepperoni Pizza    C  Artifact – Food : Sacrifice one eighth of Pepperoni Pizza, draw a card, then gain 2 life if the drawn card was the color of a pizza topping you have eaten in the past 24 hours	Flying Carpet    C  Artifact Creature – Construct Flying Passenger 1 (Whenever Flying Carpet attacks and isn't blocked, you may place up to one blocked creatures you control on it UEOT. Flying Carpet gets +X/+0 where X is the total power of cards placed on it.) 1/2	Yesn't    C  Sorcery Counter target spell "Does this card function as intended?" "Yesn't"
Peaceful Aetherborn    C  Creature – Aetherborn When Peaceful Aetherborn enters the battlefield, you gain 1 life for each land you control. I understand my place in this world, I am fine knowing I will arrive, experience, and pass; The world will heed me as nothing more, naturally. 2/2	Gag    C  Instant Put a -1/-1 counter on target creature, if it would die this way bounce it instead	Grainforest    B  Basic Land : Add and you gain 9 life. Activate this ability only if you control six or more green creatures.	Cigar  T  Token Artifact Cigar is Red, Black and Green Smoke – , Sacrifice Cigar, Pretend to smoke for 7.75 seconds: Put two -0/-1 counters on target creature and put a Guilt counter on each of it's Parent creatures. If sixteen or more -0/-1 counters are put on a creature this way, it has ": This creature's controller gains CAD $999.99"

Swampburn (rare)
Competitive Eater (uncommon)
Boom // Explosion (uncommon)
Absorption Sponge (uncommon)
Stack Clog (common)
Get Rekt (common)
Gold Bar (common)
Tweet (common)
Char (common)
Pepperoni Pizza (common)
Flying Carpet (common)
Yesn't (common)
Peaceful Aetherborn (common)
Gag (common)
Grainforest (basic)
Cigar (token)