[NONCANON] My Random Shit: Virtual Booster

Lunar Butcher    R  Creature – Human Wizard Warrior Lunar Butcher's power and toughness are each equal to the number of lands that have left the battlefield this turn plus four : Destroy target land, then exile it from it's owners graveyard. : Exile target nonbasic land until end of turn : Return target land to it's owners hand, their maximum hand size increases by one this turn. */*	Snow Day    U  Enchantment All players do not go to school today, sacrifice Snow Day at midnight	Timelapse    U  Instant Skip target player's turn	Kermit Teh Froge    U  Legendary Creature – Frog Puppet Puppet (Any player may activate Kermit Teh Froge's abilities.), Jump Boost 1 (: Move Kermit Teh Froge up to one inches.) 0/2
Peaceful Aetherborn    C  Creature – Aetherborn When Peaceful Aetherborn enters the battlefield, you gain 1 life for each land you control. I understand my place in this world, I am fine knowing I will arrive, experience, and pass; The world will heed me as nothing more, naturally. 2/2	Animemal    C  Creature – Anime-Protagonist When Animemal enters the battlefield, it becomes any Animal Creature type of your choice for the remainder of the game 2/2	Cancerous Magic Player    C  Creature – Human Child When Cancerous Magic Player enters the battlefield, choose one: – For the remainder of the match, hold Mark Rosewater at gunpoint and force him to make a Return to Rabiah block. – For the remainder of the match, hold Mark Rosewater at gunpoint and force him to make a Return to Mercadia block. – Crease target card an opponent owns. – Unsleeve all cards in target opponent's deck – The next blue spell you cast this turn costs instead 1/1	Create    C  Instant Create something
Gucci Ganger    C  Creature – Human Rogue Gucci Ganger is Purple : You may play an equipments from your hand with converted mana cost 2 or less onto the battlefield	French Fry    C  Artifact – Food You can have any number of French Fry in your deck : Sacrifice French Fry and all cards with the same name, gain X life where X is the number of cards named French Fry you control, do this once for each card named French Fry you control	Turdle    C  Creature – Turtle Defender When Turdle enters the battlefield, Defecate 1 (Exile one cards from the top of your library. Put each card with a lower CMC exiled this way into your hand. If you can't, discard a card.). 1/2	Ender Pearl    C  Artifact Sacrifice Ender Pearl: Move target creature to another position on the battlefield and shock it
Hot Pocket    C  Artifact – Food Storage 1 (As long as there are one or fewer cards on this permanent, you may put a card from your hand onto it face down. Activate this ability at sorcery speed. : Choose a card on Hot Pocket and put it into your hand. If you do, you may cast it for four mana of any combination of colors or colorless less this turn. Activate this ability only if the chosen card has been on Hot Pocket for at least one turn.) , Sacrifice Hot Pocket: You gain 3 life and Hot Pocket shocks you.	Nitslave    C  Creature – Human Slave : Create a Yarn token : Sacrifice Nitslave and two Yarn tokens, you may play an Equipment from your hand onto the battlefield 1/2	Wheatfarm    B  Basic Land : Add , then you gain 1 life	GMOPork  T  Artifact – "Fude" : Sacrifice GMOPork, smell a dog fart, and eat wet hair

Lunar Butcher (rare)
Snow Day (uncommon)
Timelapse (uncommon)
Kermit Teh Froge (uncommon)
Peaceful Aetherborn (common)
Animemal (common)
Cancerous Magic Player (common)
Create (common)
Gucci Ganger (common)
French Fry (common)
Turdle (common)
Ender Pearl (common)
Hot Pocket (common)
Nitslave (common)
Wheatfarm (basic)
GMOPork (token)